It's funny how the earlier generations always complain about the younger ones having no respect for authority. Kids go through phases. Some misbehave. It doesn't make it okay to stick soap or Tobasco in their mouths. I'm sure all the qualified professionals who are against physical punishment and the studies done showing the negative effects are all codswollop. Because people have their own anecdotes that prove it's harmless, because THEY weren't effected by it.
And what about the people that WERE effected by it? Why aren't you mentioning them? The older generations are FAR from perfect. I know people who were hit as kids. All they learnt was how to hide their bad behavior better. They never learnt WHY they shouldn't do certain things. Fear through physical punishment is not the answer to disciplining kids. That's how you push them away.
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26-06-2015 10:40 #21
Last edited by hopeful1986; 26-06-2015 at 10:42.
26-06-2015 10:42 #22Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2012
How about a family swear jar? They're only young so they probably don't have money to contribute, but maybe it could be changed to 10min of cleaning time or losing 10mins of screen time or something like that?
They'd be more likely to take it seriously if they see you doing it as well.
26-06-2015 10:42 #23
It might not be abuse but it is feral.
Never heard of that before moving to Australia.
Why would a parent choose this punishment when there are other ways to deal with it that are more effective and respectful of your kid is beyond me.
26-06-2015 11:13 #24
The swear jar is a great idea. If they don't get pocket money, maybe you could write things on tokens (e.g. Lights off by 8 / no phone for 24 hours etc) and get them to pick a punishment instead.
26-06-2015 11:15 #25
Sorry, it is abuse.
DSS had his mother force him to put soap in his mouth when he swore. He told a teacher at school, and DOCS were called in. She got a serious talking to, a report was written, and they checked in every other week for months.
What worked for us was me sitting DSS down and saying how sad it makes us. And that we would have to tell grandma he was acting this way. He adores his grandmother, and knew what he was doing was wrong, so it freaked him out.
Following through on that (telling grandma) showed him that we were serious.
He never cursed in our house, just his mother's. It stopped after we had a conversation including grandma. That was a year ago now.
26-06-2015 12:05 #26
OP I'm going to assume the humiliation, physical force and yes dangerous abuse of forcing a child to consume TOXIC chemicals in soap and heat of Tabasco is a joke and you won't take that advice and lead by example, give consequences ( like grounding or taking away privileges )
The fact they are walking the streets , swearing at you and swearing so much is a huge concern - how long have they been this way and maybe they don't take you seriously and you need to be more consistent?
When my niece swore at my sister ( at 9) she took away her iPad for a week and she's never done it again
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26-06-2015 12:18 #27
OP, do your kids receive pocket money?
Perhaps you could make up a chart where they start the week with $10, and if they swear you deduct money? Perhaps the first offence they lose $5, if they swear a second time take $3, then if they dare to swear a 3rd time deduct the remaining $2.
There needs to be consequences every time they offend. They will soon learn to be more careful if they know there's going to be some form of punishment involved.
Alternatively there could be a reward on offer at the end of each week if they have a 'swear free' week, like an outing to a movie they really want to see. If one of them swears, cancel your plans and stick with it.
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26-06-2015 13:39 #28Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
Do you honestly not realise how ridiculous your statement is?
26-06-2015 13:46 #29
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26-06-2015 13:47 #30
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