If it were my friend I would advise her to arm herself with as much information as possible before making a decision one way or the other. See a specialist, read as much as she can, make sure that his guy is "the one" before she enters into a sexual relationship with him.
+ Reply to Thread
Results 11 to 20 of 28
23-06-2015 09:12 #11
The Following User Says Thank You to Once Upon a Time For This Useful Post:
23-06-2015 10:22 #12Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2015
Such a tricky situation isn't it! I do not envy her at all. He said he understands is she no longer wants to persue a relationship with him & that just broke my heart for both of them
He really is a nice guy & thats what I've been saying to her.
I've said 'put it this way, most guys wouldn't tell you & would just risk it, and you probably would have ended up contacting it anyway. This guy owned up to it so there was no nasty suprises, probably in hope that you'd respect his honesty & see past it"
her response was "thats easy for you to say, you're not the one going to catch it"
Check & mate.
23-06-2015 10:27 #13
I am blown away by this man's honesty, good on him.
I wouldn't be able to pursue a relationship though. If it went ahead, got serious, she contracted it, and for some reason they split... she would then be in his position for life.
The Following User Says Thank You to DT75 For This Useful Post:
23-06-2015 13:35 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
I think it's great that he was honest. I think her best bet is to go speak to a health professional and get a realistic idea of whether or not she can protect herself. I have always been under the impression that it is only contagious during an active flare up, but I'm not a doctor.
23-06-2015 13:46 #15
I don't think I would continue the relationship myself. I suppose it depends how hard I had fallen.... I really don't think I've ever fallen for a man that hard that it wouldn't matter to me though. I am married, and obviously if my husband had a health issue that effected me negatively in some way, well we would work thorugh it, because he's my husband and the father of my children! But yeah.. if I wasn't tied to a man and he dropped that bombshell, pretty sure I'd be moving on. I feel terrible for the guy though
23-06-2015 13:47 #16Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2012
Does anyone know what the risks are, the long term effects when you have herpes?
I'd need ALL the facts, what impact it could have in my life. You then weigh it up.
In a funny way he actually sounds like a keeper. Disclosing that upfront is really honourable.
The Following User Says Thank You to Olive Oil For This Useful Post:
23-06-2015 14:24 #17
It's a virus(eta: with some nasty symptoms). Not a pleasant one, nor would the flare ups be pleasant. But, if he seemed like the one and depending on how the relationship was progressing then I might risk it. Safely of course and with Dr advice.
I don't think it would be a deal breaker for me.
23-06-2015 14:37 #18
What a hard decision for your friend. Can she pursue the relationship for a little while with no sexual contact to see how she feels about him? From a quick google search herpes is much less contagious when there are no active lesions, but there is still a small chance of contracting it. So basically if they were together for life there is a possibility she would end up catching it at some stage. God what a hard situation and personally I don't think I could continue a relationship as I've heard some people can have multiple outbreaks a year and they are really painful (in saying that, some people might only have an outbreak every couple of years)
I feel for him and your friend as he sounds lovely!
23-06-2015 14:46 #19
I think its important to remember that it is manageable with daily medication too. And just like cold sores, flare ups become less and less frequent. If he is that open about his sexual status id guess he has had it for a while, therefore would be managing it with the appropriate medications and preventatives.
23-06-2015 15:33 #20
What a great guy for telling her. Apparently 1 in 8 aussie adults have herpes, many don't even know it. So many people would be sleeping or have slept with someone who has it. It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me - you just need to take some extra precautions during a flare up. How many people do you know who get cold sores? They can give you genital herpes, yet somehow cold sores seem more socially acceptable than cold sores on the genitals (both are herpes and both are interchangeable).
By harvs in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & ChatReplies: 15Last Post: 24-01-2015, 09:19
Cryosite Family Cord Blood & Tissue BankCryosite has been providing Cord Blood Banking services for over 14 years, and is the trusted choice of Australian ...
LATESTWhy it is OK for your child to be differentWhat is a blessing way? How is it different to a baby shower?7 ways to break the ‘mumnotony’ at home
POPULARWhen can I start giving chores to my children?New baby nursery checklist – a guide to newborn essentialsWhat to pack for labour and hospital – a checklist
FORUMS - chatting now ...
April/May TTC group chatConception & Fertility General Chat
Married At First Sight 2017Movies / Music / Books / TV Chat
TTC #1 - Conception & Due Date TimingConception & Fertility General Chat
The Not So Serious Vent Thread #7General Chat
Albert?Choosing Baby Names
IVF babies due Sep/Oct/Nov 2017pregnancy and babies through IVF