Children has a unique way of testing and changing you as a person sometimes it brings you closer sometimes further apart. Ex-h and I were closer after #1 and much much further apart after #2. Her birth was traumatic and with no support I lost myself, went back to work early and chose to ignore life. I got help, left the relationship and moved on. Now being in a new relationship I can see a million red flags in hindsight that our marriage was always doomed regardless of if we had, had children or not. There was no balance or equality. I was the head of the household and decision maker, I kept us together so when I couldn't cope and he didn't step up there was nothing left of the relationship.
Now with my new man. I was sick this morning and he told me to get back in bed and he would take the kids to daycare ❤️❤️❤️
+ Reply to Thread
Results 31 to 37 of 37
29-05-2015 07:58 #31
The Following User Says Thank You to anonomum For This Useful Post:
01-06-2015 15:51 #32
And just for the record while dh and I were together for 12 years pre kids that isn't to say everyone should be 😁 A good years yes, not neccessarily 12!
01-06-2015 16:08 #33
My DH and I were together for 6 years before we got married, then married for 1 before DS 1 was born, ds1 is now 4.
It's not been possible for us to 'make time' for each other as much as we could, and keeping the spark alive, well that hasn't happened either, with the exhaustion, PND, etc.
Unfortunately for us, EVERYTHING changed when our ds1 was born. DH was very hands on, he got up during the night to DS, he cooked, he worked full time, he was supportive of me, he tried to help with my PND etc, and then when DS2 came, we moved to a house and had a bigger mortgage, and he got lazy with a lot of stuff, his controlling personality showed it's ugly head and he's become stressed, verbally abusive etc. things have changed massively due to having kids.
The extra financial strain, the lack of support for things like babysitting for us to have some quality time together, resentment towards each other, more severe PND where I was completely unsupported by him... The list goes on.
I think we barely like each other.
The fact we are still together is either a ****en miracle, or it's a huge mistake, I am still trying to figure out which.
02-06-2015 07:17 #34Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2008
02-06-2015 07:40 #35
Dh and I were together for 9 years when ds was born we had had our ups and downs prior and our relationship was stronger than ever.
Our ds is now almost 15 months old and we've a couple of issues in the last couple of months, most have been due to financial struggles and disagreements on cc options for ds so I can go back to work. I think if we didn't have the foundation we had prior to ds' birth we would have seperated already.
Sent from my GT-I9507 using The Bub Hub mobile app
02-06-2015 07:53 #36
02-06-2015 08:51 #37
on the 16th of November this year, My hubby and I will have been together for 9 years, 8 years since the day we got engaged, and 7 years since the day we got married (yes all the same anniversary day ). Our eldest will turn 6 one month later, and our 4th will be due at the same time
I can't even say we've had ups and down to be honest. There's been times, when I've seen other peoples extremely loved up relationships, and I've thought hmm.. we don't really have that. He doesn't give me butterflies, I don't want to jump him when he gets home from work... but you know what? He's my best mate. We are an amazing family. We don't stress about life, we don't struggle with the kids, we both make sure the other gets time to do the things they need to do for themselves. We don't agree on everything, but our disagreements are so very minor, we never yell at each other. My son said to me the other day out of the blue "You and Daddy never fight", and I smiled happily and said "You're right honey, we really don't!". It was so random and so nice to realise that it's something he has noticed other people do and we don't.
Anyone who has had much to do with me as a poster on this forum will know I have terrible self esteem issues and very very rarely speak nicely of myself, but i can tell you now, I am very very proud of our family. We are awesome. High Five to all those who still like each other after kiddos
By ExcuseMyFrench in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & ChatReplies: 16Last Post: 16-06-2014, 11:28
TPS Health Physiotherapy and PilatesTPS Health Physiotherapy and Pilates has three clinics located at Morningside, Redlands and Lutwyche. We offer pre and ...
LATESTWhy it is OK for your child to be differentWhat is a blessing way? How is it different to a baby shower?7 ways to break the ‘mumnotony’ at home
POPULARWhen can I start giving chores to my children?New baby nursery checklist – a guide to newborn essentialsWhat to pack for labour and hospital – a checklist
FORUMS - chatting now ...
Bulk-Billing may end for after-hours home doctor services - petition!Can you help with these campaigns?
Pokemon go. Chat #2General Chat
Would you breastfeed in public?Viewer Polls
For those of you with babies and toddlers....General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
IVF babies due Sep/Oct/Nov 2017pregnancy and babies through IVF
deciding what hospitalSeeking a Maternity Hospital
Lite & Easy ???Second Trimester Chat