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  1. #51
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    OP Im sorry youre in a tough spot ATM. Not quite the same, but we had a small business years ago, &lost a lot of money through it. Luckily it was pre kids & we were young enough to be able to move on financially easily enough. It looks like you will need to make some changes in your life to make things work. I totally get it, change is tough, especially when you feel forced into it. A few ideas - I am assuming your farm is a little hobby type farm? Can you sell produce & make any income that way? How about incorporating farming duties into the schooling? The kids could learn a lot from it & can help out around the place. Could you downsize & get rid of any animals? I think its totally unfair your kids had to leave the school they were being bullied at. Can you return to the school & fight the ed. Dept and school on any issues that arise? Can the kids bus to the other school? Are there any jobs in the area where the school is further away, so you can drive the kids to school,work during the day, & pick them up after? Can you work weekends if your DH is home? Im sorry for the situation you are in, im sorry to day but i also dont feel that the govt has to fund lifesyles like a hobby farm. Can you move to another area &cut your losses? Im sorry again for the tough spot you are in, i hope thongs can improve.

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  3. #52
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    But are we thr kind of society that recognises that a woman is a 'dependant spouse?' Maybe we've moved beyond that & see women as able to work these days?
    Quote Originally Posted by HappyBovine View Post
    Exactly. Until the early nineties it was something people could claim on their tax returns. In about 1995 Centrelink took over and 20 years later everyone seems to think it is a welfare payment. The government changes the eligibility criteria and those that ask " what happened?" are now bludgers who aren't trying hard enough.

    The irony is that the same people who are accusing others of being welfare bludgers are more often than not the same people who boast about getting huge tax returns themselves.

  4. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by heplusme View Post
    This isnt even a SAHM/working mum issue. You have totally flipped it into an entirely different issue. People have just said that if your youngest is school age, and you cant afford your lifestyle it has to change. PPL is for newborns when you are supposed to be at home nurturing them.

    The government doesnt have to fund our lives. If we couldnt afford our lifestyle anymore we would have to move. If i have no money, i dont buy anything. It sucks but its a fact of life and theres no point in me stamping my feet for free money to sustain my choice to live where we do-you change your circumstances.
    Does that mean you think that the 'closing down' of Aboriginal communities is ok? Because its a lifestyle choice to live in the middle of nowhere (no employment prospects etc) - no matter how vested or connected to the land you may be? Genuine question - just asking?

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  6. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by KitiK View Post
    Does that mean you think that the 'closing down' of Aboriginal communities is ok? Because its a lifestyle choice to live in the middle of nowhere (no employment prospects etc) - no matter how vested or connected to the land you may be? Genuine question - just asking?
    This is again a totally seperate issue. Im not taking the bait. Sorry!

  7. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by NoteToSelf View Post
    We did the tree change thing, got the acreage.

    Realised
    A) it's a lot of work
    B) we moved away from our supports
    C) we were travelling really long distances to our jobs
    D) the schooling options weren't great and while the acreage was great for kids the rest of it wasn't

    Solution, sell up at great financial loss to move back to the city.

    At no point did I think it was the governments responsibility to maintain us in that lifestyle!
    It was hardly a tree change by any means. We knew what we were in for with regards to the hard work and the lifestyle. What we didn't count on was DH being made redundant and not being able to send the kids to the local school. I suppose that it's like getting married - we set ourselves a goal of where we need to be to, what we want for our children. We got there and then things took a turn for the worse. Did we know it was going to go wrong? NO absolutely not. So our choices are we battle along as were are for a bit longer or we go bankrupt. If I were to stop studying now and get a night job (hypothetically because to is no work here but if I did) we would be in this predicament for a lot longer. I think you need to be careful about how you attack people on here with your comments. They are quite hurtful particularly to someone who is doing it very tough right now.

  8. #56
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    I recognise it is not the same - but the same principle applies. I'm genuinely trying to figure out what makes one ok and not the other - I respect your choice not to respond.

  9. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by heplusme View Post
    This isnt even a SAHM/working mum issue. You have totally flipped it into an entirely different issue. People have just said that if your youngest is school age, and you cant afford your lifestyle it has to change. PPL is for newborns when you are supposed to be at home nurturing them.

    The government doesnt have to fund our lives. If we couldnt afford our lifestyle anymore we would have to move. If i have no money, i dont buy anything. It sucks but its a fact of life and theres no point in me stamping my feet for free money to sustain my choice to live where we do-you change your circumstances.
    Of course it's working vs SAHM, it always is. If it wasn't you would fight for your own entitlements but accept what we at home receive too. There is this constant passive aggressive superiority towards SAHM's on here. I'm sick of it.

    It's actually not an entirely different issue at all. It's the same. Everything you've said could easily be directed at working mums as well, every word. You don't want it to be the same bc it shows hypocrisy and sanctimony.

    Gah it's time to log off. It always falls on deaf ears anyway. OP I'm sorry things are so tough

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  11. #58
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    I think the idea has some merit, but there really aren't many jobs out there that are school hours friendly and sometimes it can be hard to get before and after school care. Australia is one of the most inflexible nations in Asia pacific region when it comes to working families. This needs to change dramatically if the government wants mums to go back to work.
    Last edited by BigRedV; 25-05-2015 at 14:49.

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  13. #59
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    Thats cool. When dad dies, i am gonna have to find night work and leave kiddo home alone. No one else to rely on.

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  15. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    "SAHMS, the tax payer shouldn't fund you anything to be at home, why should we pay for your lifestyle choices?.....
    I don't know about other working mums, but I certainly don't think this at all. As a working mum who wishes I could stay home, I'd love if there was enough government funding for me to do so, but there just isn't, and so I have to work. I see absolutely no issue in the Government funding mum's to stay home and raise their babies.

    But to me, the funding ending when the youngest goes to school makes sense? It just does. I am very very sorry to everyone who this is going to effect negatively if it goes through. It would be a very stressful time for you wondering if it's going to happen and having to put plans into place. Sometimes life really just is hard, too hard sometimes!!

    I really really do think more workplaces need to have 9-2 working days for parents with young school children. If only something could be done about this.
    Last edited by CazHazKidz; 25-05-2015 at 14:48.

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