I think how each of you perceive the relationship you have is different.
She obviously thinks you're quite close it would like you to be.
I think now you've said yes, you need to honour the commitment.
If you hadn't said yes, you could have politely declined.
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09-04-2015 20:56 #11
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09-04-2015 21:42 #12
I don't see the issue with it. She values your friendship and perhaps more than you value it but you agreed and it will probably crush her if you back out now. Whilst I would find it odd I wouldn't be bothered by it. It's not really much more than you giving up a day to be at her wedding. She would have invited you anyway and you may have attended the wedding as a guest so still invested time in being there. Why not play a special role for her day to make her happy? Poor thing I feel for her.
09-04-2015 21:52 #13
You have already said yes, the bride sounds lonely, suck it up.
09-04-2015 23:10 #14
My best friend of about 10 years asked me to be her bridesmaid when her first choice couldn't make the overseas trip to be here for the day. I had not ever met her fiance or her family, and I knew about 4 of the hundred that attended. I felt awkward the whole day but all in all it was a nice excuse to get all prettied up, a little pampered and have a nice meal. Try and think of the positives
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10-04-2015 00:05 #15
I had asked a work friend to be my bridesmaid. She said yes then pulled out a few months later leaving me with no one. I have to say even ten years later it still hurts to know that I never had a friend with me to experience the fun in getting ready with and spent the morning of my wedding pretty much alone.
Why dont you make the lead up to the wedding as an excuse to form a better friendship?
10-04-2015 06:30 #16
It would be pretty awful to pull out since you have already said yes. Take some time to get to know her better, and enjoy being part of a wedding!
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Wise Enough (10-04-2015)
10-04-2015 06:41 #17
I agree with others. You said yes. You should honour that commitment and make her feel special.
It's only a day. Or perhaps a fitting or two and hens night. It obviously means a lot to her.... so you should put your feelings aside and put her first.
10-04-2015 08:02 #18
Definitely do it and do your absolute best to make her day special. It's not about you, it's about her.
10-04-2015 08:28 #19
I think you should do it. You already told her you would. It may be the beginning of a beautiful friendship neither of you expected!
10-04-2015 18:01 #20
I agree, you should go ahead and do it. You wouldn't have to go all out and plan a hens or be the bridesmaid of the year....even some close bridesmaids don't get totally involved! Is she asking you to fork out big bucks for the dress/shoes/jewellery? That might be a bit much I guess. I also agree with a PP who said to say a firm no to your dd being involved or going.....just say it would be too stressful and sorry, but no to that.
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