As i said this is the first book ive read...i didnt know there was even a SOS section! Of course im willing to look at other books and websites with routines in them, as a PP just suggested one that might suit us too! I was more curious as to what issues people had with the routine, as to me (with no experience) it seems fine.
I havnt decided on anything, i have said how many times in this thread i have no experience so am seeking support and advice. Thats it.
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07-04-2015 10:33 #111
07-04-2015 10:34 #112
07-04-2015 12:28 #113
07-04-2015 12:53 #114
I really liked the routine from SOS. It helped me get a better understanding of when bub was hungry/tired/etc.
I also found the dream feeds helped in the first week of implementing the routine.
Apart from some minor tweaks to the routine, I used my own methods of getting bub off to sleep (pat and 'shh' for grizzling, cuddles for crying).
ETA I've recommended the book to other mums that were having a tough time with sleep, but have suggested giving it a quick read and then bookmarking the routines as that was all that I really found helpful.
Last edited by atomicmama; 07-04-2015 at 12:55.
07-04-2015 12:56 #115
For the record, I don't really care if you use the book or not, I've used sections of it as well, I kept photos of her times on my phone. But, I'm just trying to save you the possible anxiety you may give yourself by trying to follow a book like SOS from day dot. I think a majority of us had a lot of plans about how we were going to parent while pregnant and then the baby arrives and it all goes out the window. Sometimes because your baby isn't having a bar of it and sometimes because you realize you want to be a completely different parent. So many people are so shocked at the type of mom I am after the fact that I was a pretty strict nanny and that because a lot of what I thought I'd do completely changed once I had him. My only regret this past year is that I wish I worried less about his sleeping. Worrying about causing bad habits and sleep associations (all implied by the books I read) caused a lot of unneeded anxiety for me. Now he's 14 months, naps like a champ and sleeps pretty well at night after completely weaning himself cold turkey off of breastfeeding, the fog has lifted and I actually feel good about how I've done and really happy that I didn't sleep train him with any 'hardcore' methods as we both found our way in the end in a way that worked for us.
I guess I'm just trying to say to be open to the fact that you may end up being a completely different mom than you imagine and that's ok.
07-04-2015 13:10 #116
My issue with Tizzie in regards to this is that she actually believed this and I'm going to assume edited it out of newer additions because it caused problems. Yes, a toddler or preschooler may vomit or poo 'on purpose' but I do not believe a baby would. Regardless of whether it was 'on purpose' or not I find it incredibly poor parenting advice to say you leave them in it to prove a point, you are meant to be the parent regardless of your child's intentions. Do you not hold their hand to cross the street when they constantly fight you and break-free because you want to prove a point? Or do you figure out a reasonable and mature way to deal with their behavior and help them learn?
07-04-2015 13:18 #117
I was taught one little thing when at mother's group one day that helped me so much. If bub is happy and awake they'll lay there with an open hand and quite calmly look around and what not. As soon as they start to get tired their hand curls into a fist and they often start waving them around. I watched DS more closely after hearing that and, sure enough, when he started to do this I would give him a quick feed, swaddle him and he'd doze off to sleep. Babies often fall into their own routine too. You really could have set a clock to DS he was that spot on with his.
Last edited by Chunkydunks; 07-04-2015 at 13:23.
07-04-2015 13:23 #118
I'll be nitpicky not to cause the OP any confusion @hollygolighyly so not wanting to start anything but the section you refer to on this forum is actually Pro Controlled Crying, not Pro SOS.
They are two different things. SOS settling is different from controlled crying. SOS advises a set time to leave bub to cry before going in to them but once you go in after that time (or less if bub is doing an emotional cry or you don't feel comfortable with the time) you stay in the room with your bub and aid them to sleep for a further period if time. You only leave the room once bub is asleep or if they don't sleep at all you get them up to try again later.
Controlled crying is where you set a small time period like 3 minutes, you go in after 3 minutes of crying, calm baby down and leave the room and wait a longer period of time- say 5 minutes before you go in and do the same thing, then increase it again to say 10, then 12 etc.
Also there's then CIO - cry it out where you put bub down and not return into the room at night at all until morning (like that paediatrician in New York who advised to do that to 8 week olds.
So OP don't look for a 'pro-SOS' section, it doesn't exist, but even though SOS isn't controlled crying, that's perhaps a place you can feel 'safe' to discuss using SOS, not debating it. (Though beware it can still get heated depending if people want to play nice)
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07-04-2015 13:28 #119
Save Our Sleep
Perhaps it was a poorly chosen comparison, but you have used a statement that implies parents following SOS are irresponsible, which I think is highly unfair and insulting.
Last edited by A-Squared; 07-04-2015 at 13:38.
07-04-2015 13:41 #120
With respect @hollyGollighty, i dont think it matters what section i posted this in. Someone would have been in to debate on it. For the record, it isnt in the "debate it" section either.
Im asking for help! No wonder people are afraid to ask questions about parenting. What was a genuine question seeking advice has turned into a platform for others to argue with eachother.
If you are getting emotional about it, please step out! I am more confused then i was before reading all of these debate comments.
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