Dealing with difficult inlaws.

**linz82** · 09-03-2015 15:47

Hi guys, just after some advice. My SIL is constantly trying to tell me how to raise my daughter. She has no children but is forever telling me how I need to stop being so "crazy protective" of my 13 month old. She wants to put nail polish and make up on her, I dont and now apparently, im pushing my "wierd ideals" onto my daughter. Any ideas before I end up off my trolley?? 😩

**GlitterFarts** · 09-03-2015 16:03

I'd firmly but politely tell her it's your daughter and you will raise her as you see fit... and when SHE has her own kids, she can do all she desires to them..but for now, leave the parenting up to you.

**ExcuseMyFrench** · 09-03-2015 16:06

Well SHE is the one pushing her weird ideals on her niece.

I'd tell her strongly enough that she is my kid, my rules. Wouldn't engage further.

**RaraMum** · 09-03-2015 16:14

Everyone (parent or not) seems to have an opinon on parenting. If you think you are doing the best and making the right choices for your child tell her so. Your child your choice! My SIL wants to straighten DDs hair all the time. No chance buddy.

**VicPark** · 09-03-2015 18:31

Don't engage... Don't have a discussion with her about issues like that. If she tries to start something just say "I'm not having this conversation with you." Then ignore her.

**Lincolns mummy** · 09-03-2015 19:10

I would just say she is my child so my rules.
Who on earth wants to put make up on a 13 month old!

**Penny88** · 09-03-2015 19:13

Is your SIL younger or immature for her age? Sounds like she thinks your DD is a doll to play with. I'd start out by explaining how kid's skin is sensitive so cosmetics might give her a rash as she might simply have no idea about babies.

**TheGooch** · 09-03-2015 21:34

Originally Posted by VicPark

Don't engage... Don't have a discussion with her about issues like that. If she tries to start something just say "I'm not having this conversation with you." Then ignore her.

This absolutely this.
Do not engage.
Just because someone tries to start a topic of conversation doesn't mean you owe them a response.
Change the subject or as @VicPark suggested, say "I'm not having this conversation".
Put it on repeat. Be consistent and don't get into it!

**bella25** · 09-03-2015 21:39

I'd be really upfront. If she pushes you on this, she'll expect to push you on other things. Just say "yep We are going to keep her sweet and innocent as long as she lets us"! Then it's also respecting your dd as a person too - she's not a doll!!!

**linz82** · 12-03-2015 11:34

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone. My SIL is the same age as me-34 so u would think common sense would prevail. My daughter just came home from her house with painted toe nails. I went with the tell her firmly no approach. To cut a long story short we got into a massive argument where I was called a *** cu*t and we havent spoken to each other since. Now the rest of the family hates us because we made her cry. Ill go for the no engagement tactic next time 😣

Dealing with difficult inlaws.

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