Nope, no allergies, and nope I don't expect a separate meal. They eat what we eat and if they make something that I know my kids can't eat (basically the only thing I could think of that they couldn't / wouldn't would be an overly hot curry) then I would take something else for them, but I normally don't know what they are serving until we get there.
Last night it was T-bone steak, chips and salad.
I specifically asked hubby to ask if they were providing food for the boys and his dad said yes that they could 'work something out'
When we got there and dinner was served, there were enough steaks for the adults and I was told *i* could share MY steak with my boys.
Don't get me wrong, my boys could eat my entire steak and I wouldn't give a damn, but the point is that i think if you invite people, you should cater for them all.
They know my boys eats anything and everything, yet they just don't cater for them.
My ds2 has 15 teeth at 1 yr old so he's eating what we eat! Luckily I had a frozen meal I could take for him as he likes to eat at 5, and every time we go to Inlaws, despite them knowing this, his dad will wait until HE is ready before he starts serving or cooking food. DH asked him 3 times last night and MIL asked him once to get the food ready asy ds1 was getting hungry. He's also used to eating at 5 but he can wait and he's happy to wait, but by 6:30 he was getting cranky
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03-03-2015 13:13 #11
03-03-2015 13:18 #12
This happens every time we go there for dinner and generally I can throw something together either before we leave the house (or grab something I has frozen) or sometimes if they are having lasagne or similar dish then of course my boys will eat that.
But I find it weird that FIL will often ask me if the boys will want food...?? Why does he even ask? We get there at like 3/4pm most times so he would know they haven't eaten already (he does know they eat at 5 at home) and then there are times like last night with the steak where he will only buy enough for the adults.
Sometimes even when he makes a lasagne or something, he won't make enough for the boys to be included. My boys have pretty big appetites too (which he also knows as he comments on it all the time) and yet he still doesn't make enough.
03-03-2015 13:20 #13
I always take food for DD to my parents, in laws and friends who don't have kids houses. DD is a picky eater and eats at 6, if I bring her food I know she will eat it and I can give it to her when she's hungry rather than waiting for her to get cranky or insisting that everyone else eats early.
The only time I don't take it is when we have all been invited to a friends house who also have kids so I know they will serve kid friendly food at an early time.
It doesnt bother me at all, in fact I had never really thought about it before.
Im sure when she is older and eating a better food variety then I might expect food to be provided for her.
03-03-2015 13:22 #14
That sounds so frustrating!
As others have said, I can understand if your kids wouldn't eat what the adults were eating, but it's really strange to just not provide food for them, especially for a kid who's nearly 4!
03-03-2015 13:22 #15
I think we have the same ILs! Which is why we don't got there for dinner anymore.
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03-03-2015 13:31 #16
Just for the record, I wouldn't expect anyone else to cater for my kids if we were invited for dinner, especially childless friends. Luckily for us, most of our friends do have kids and I know they will cater for our kids, and that's awesome but not expected, but when it's my Inlaws, i do find it a bit weird.
And as for the timing of when food is served, I wouldn't expect everyone to eat early purely for my kids, if I know dinner will be served later, then I do take my own meals for my boys, but FIL is known to eat only when he is ready. Everyone could be saying how starving they are but he will still wait until 6/6:30 before he starts to cook.
MIL especially likes to eat early, and always has, and sometimes with meals like lasagne, if he only puts it in the oven at 6:30, it will take at least 30/40 minutes to cook the pasta, and he also knows that when we come over we like to go home at a reasonable time to get the kids in bed. It's usually a week night / school night that we go there and our boys are in bed by 7 although we are happy to make exceptions in these occasions of course, but that's also why we end up going there so early 3/4pm, so we can leave at a reasonable time and again, he knows this and agrees on the phone when we organise it.
I know it's something I'll just have to live with and take my boys meals every time and that's fine, but last night it just annoyed me as he said that he had the boys dinner covered but he didn't.
03-03-2015 13:41 #17
Why does FIL cook all the time? Are your boys biologically related to him?
03-03-2015 13:46 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2012
- Brisbane North
next time I'd just say that by the time you feed the kids, it's too late to come... sorry!
03-03-2015 13:53 #19
This is very odd and if I were you I would probably stop or limit the amount of times we go there for dinner. Your children are part of your family and I feel it is extremely rude for someone to not even think about the fact they might want to eat dinner too.
I always feed my kids before we go anywhere for dinner, except my parents as I know mum knows what my kids will/won't eat. But whenever we go somewhere for dinner the host has always cooked enough for my kids too and is usually surprised I have fed them beforehand.
I wouldn't dare invite friends/family for dinner and only cook for the adults.
03-03-2015 13:59 #20
That is so weird!
Next time they invite you over just say 'no thanks, it's too annoying having to whip something up when you don't feed the kids'.
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