My child has a year 5 camp that is fast approaching. In the beginning she was ok about going, but now is adamant she doesn't want to. DD has never been keen on sleep overs, even with close friends and declines any of these invitations.
She seems really upset about the prospect of spending four nights away from home, and I know as the day draws nearer she will become more and more anxious about it.
I haven't yet paid or signed permission notes as I am so undecided on what to do, and once paid for there is no refund. I know that it will be a great opportunity for her to grow and discover just how much she is capable of. I know that she will have fun with her friends. I just feel so bad about being the one who says "you have to go" when she says she really doesn't want to.
I know that ultimately the decision is mine, but just after any opinions or thoughts on how to deal with this. Would you send your child?
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12-02-2015 10:59 #1Senior Member
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- Feb 2008
12-02-2015 11:06 #2Senior Member
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- Mar 2014
Are you able to attend the first day or 2 as a parent helper? My dd is similar as far as anxiety - until she gets into whatever she is doing... I personally wouldnt force my kids into anything like that particulalry if they are anxious. I would use gentle encouragement and let them know that they can come home anytime if they decide to go (would advise the teachers to call me and I'd come get her). Good luck, its hard and sometimes a fine line encouraging independence.
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12-02-2015 11:06 #3
My middle boy is grade 5. He wanted to go on camp first but has now changed his mind, I'm just letting it be for this year. I'd really like him to go next year though.
Eta: he is Aspergers and I can't attend as I have other kids at home. I personally think he'd have a ball but he's adamant
12-02-2015 11:08 #4
Definitely not. I wouldn't make them go at all.
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12-02-2015 11:10 #5
My DS has never been keen on sleep overs or anything and when his camp came up he didn't go. I didn't want to make him do something he didn't want too.
12-02-2015 11:11 #6
I would try to encourage her to go but be prepared to pick her up if she needed. Is the camp close enough that you can drive her there to help her settle in?
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12-02-2015 11:13 #7
I have been on a few camps with grade 5/6 kids who haven't spent much or any time away from home before. They do get homesick and cry.
We try and be there for them as much as we can, but there is only so much "teacher" a 10 year old can tolerate. We also encourage their good friends to comfort them, and you get to see just how lovely and caring some kids are.
In the past few years, some of these kids have been allowed to take a phone on camp- to be kept with the head teacher- but then they can have instant contact with mum and dad when they want. The first night they are usually in tears on the phone saying they want to go home, but it does improve.
By the last day they are happy to be going home, but also glad they went.
The decision is entirely up to you and her- knowing how some kids react when away from mum and dad actually makes it harder for me to decide, but ultimately I think it's always a huge shame when kids miss out on wonderful life experiences such as this. Some of my favourite memories from primary school are the camps.
12-02-2015 11:14 #8Senior Member
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- Dec 2005
I wouldn't make my child attend but I'd definitely ask about being a parent helper and see if you could tag along.
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12-02-2015 11:24 #9
No, definitely not if it were to cause that sort of anxiety for my child.
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12-02-2015 12:05 #10
Ultimately, only you can decide as you know her best but have you considered letting her do half the camp time? That is an extremely long first camp...I'm a teacher also and the kids who were nervous that did go ended up having a great time and while it was hard, they were ok. I feel for the kids left back at school as even though they feel better about it at the time, when all their friends get back and school work centers around the shared activities they are so left out
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