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  1. #141
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    Default Leaving sleeping baby at home..alone?!

    Quote Originally Posted by AMC14 View Post
    You don't know that she does... Once she made a bad choice, how many of us as mums haven't made a couple of bad choices? None of us are perfect! Im pretty sure on this forum none of us have proclaimed to be a perfect parent!

    Im pretty sure the OP would be on it now and as she has previously stated will talk to her friend.

    Let's not crucify the poor woman based on 1 bad choice
    This.

    I think I have an issue with some of the terminology being used in this thread... Is it considered abuse to have an extreme lapse in judgment but where no harm was caused and the person who committed the act later realises their error and vows not to do it again?
    Last edited by MsViking; 04-02-2015 at 20:33.

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  3. #142
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    I used to nanny for a family in the city - they lived in an apartment and on the ground floor was a restaurant. The children were 2 and a newborn. Both the parents are surgeons. One night they invited my fiancée (now husband) and I to have dinner with them at the restaurant so that they could meet my fiancée. When we got there, I asked where the boys were and they told us that they were asleep upstairs - on their own! I couldn't believe it. My partner and I were horrified, but didn't say anything at the time, other than, "do you think they'll be alright up there on their own?" We ate our meals as quick as possible and got out of there because we just wanted them to get back upstairs to their children. I felt sick about it at the time and as I write this, my stomach is in knots. Anything could have happened to those boys, thirteen floors up from where their parents were. Apparently they used to go downstairs for dinner quite a bit. I just shudder when I think about it. We lost our daughter from an asthma attack - she died in my arms in the matter of a minute, so I know only too well how very quickly tragedy can strike. No child should EVER be left alone in a house, and to do so is neglect.

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  5. #143
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    There is absolutely no need to lock the door and walk down the road. She could have gone and sat in the garden, leaving the house is inexcusable.

    My question is why is she not coping to the point that needs to lock her child inside the house and the walk down the road in order to get peace and calm?

    Yes motherhood isn't easy, and everyone has days where they just want to walk away but if you're at the point where you are walking away (even if just for 10 minutes) then perhaps you need some sort of support or help.
    Sitting in the garden is leaving the house though?

    Yep. Done that before. DS was in his cot. Sat outside and chain smoked three cigs before I felt it was safe to go back inside.

    You're right. I needed support and help. Asked for it. Didn't get it. It was still the best choice at that time.

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  7. #144
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    Quote Originally Posted by siansmum View Post
    I used to nanny for a family in the city - they lived in an apartment and on the ground floor was a restaurant. The children were 2 and a newborn. Both the parents are surgeons. One night they invited my fiancée (now husband) and I to have dinner with them at the restaurant so that they could meet my fiancée. When we got there, I asked where the boys were and they told us that they were asleep upstairs - on their own! I couldn't believe it. My partner and I were horrified, but didn't say anything at the time, other than, "do you think they'll be alright up there on their own?" We ate our meals as quick as possible and got out of there because we just wanted them to get back upstairs to their children. I felt sick about it at the time and as I write this, my stomach is in knots. Anything could have happened to those boys, thirteen floors up from where their parents were. Apparently they used to go downstairs for dinner quite a bit. I just shudder when I think about it. We lost our daughter from an asthma attack - she died in my arms in the matter of a minute, so I know only too well how very quickly tragedy can strike. No child should EVER be left alone in a house, and to do so is neglect.
    Siansmum, i am so, so sorry for your loss. My heart just broke reading your post. Your amazing for being strong enough to talk and offer real life perspective on this issue rather then hypotheticals which people are quick to dismiss.

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  9. #145
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    Quote Originally Posted by HopefulK View Post
    This.

    I think I have an issue with some of the terminology being used in this thread... Is it considered abuse to have an extreme lapse in judgment but where no harm was caused and the person who committed the act later realises their error and vows not to do it again?
    I do not think this case would be labelled abuse.
    Neglect, yes.
    Which is still serious.

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  11. #146
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    Quote Originally Posted by Awesome Queen of Amazingtown View Post
    Sitting in the garden is leaving the house though?

    Yep. Done that before. DS was in his cot. Sat outside and chain smoked three cigs before I felt it was safe to go back inside.

    You're right. I needed support and help. Asked for it. Didn't get it. It was still the best choice at that time.
    No problem with leaving the house, as such.
    Locking the door? Problem.
    Leaving the property? Problem.

  12. #147
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    Quote Originally Posted by siansmum View Post
    I used to nanny for a family in the city - they lived in an apartment and on the ground floor was a restaurant. The children were 2 and a newborn. Both the parents are surgeons. One night they invited my fiancée (now husband) and I to have dinner with them at the restaurant so that they could meet my fiancée. When we got there, I asked where the boys were and they told us that they were asleep upstairs - on their own! I couldn't believe it. My partner and I were horrified, but didn't say anything at the time, other than, "do you think they'll be alright up there on their own?" We ate our meals as quick as possible and got out of there because we just wanted them to get back upstairs to their children. I felt sick about it at the time and as I write this, my stomach is in knots. Anything could have happened to those boys, thirteen floors up from where their parents were. Apparently they used to go downstairs for dinner quite a bit. I just shudder when I think about it. We lost our daughter from an asthma attack - she died in my arms in the matter of a minute, so I know only too well how very quickly tragedy can strike. No child should EVER be left alone in a house, and to do so is neglect.
    I am sorry for your loss.

    I totally agree with you.

    I have in sleep deprived state forgot my baby. I called the police to hopefully get to her before I get there. This was a mistake. To go out leave a child home alone on purpose is neglect. I don't mean to take bins out etc but to get in your car and drive away from your property.

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  14. #148
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    OP, being that you bumped into her, does that mean you live close? I am just thinking that maybe next time you duck to the shops, see if she needs anything? That way, try to eliminate from this mumma doing such a silly thing again.

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  16. #149
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    I walked out of my house, locked the door and ran a few houses down to reverse our car into the front of our house once DS was down for the night. I explained why in an earlier post.

    We live in a converted Edwardian house, you open the front door and it's a door with stairs up to our flat and a door to our landlord's flat on the ground floor. He knew I was home alone and that DS was up there and obviously he has keys. He knew I had run out.

    Glad to hear many on here brand me a neglectful mom and would report me for leaving my property and running a little down the street.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post
    I walked out of my house, locked the door and ran a few houses down to reverse our car into the front of our house once DS was down for the night. I explained why in an earlier post.

    We live in a converted Edwardian house, you open the front door and it's a door with stairs up to our flat and a door to our landlord's flat on the ground floor. He knew I was home alone and that DS was up there and obviously he has keys. He knew I had run out.

    Glad to hear many on here brand me a neglectful mom and would report me for leaving my property and running a little down the street.
    Again, different scenario, you had someone else in the building know he was there and could get him if he cried, there was a fire or god forbid you never came back.

    I think peoples attempts to ensure amazing queen from awesometown could see the difference between what she did and what the OPs friend did so threw about other okay scenarios, but that doesn't make what you did neglectful either.

    You basically left him with another adult In the same property.... Very different from the OPs friend did as well.

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