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  1. #11
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    Hi OP, I feel for you it must be a difficult position to be in. If I was not married and he had already broken an engagement previously, I would give the baby my last name. There is nothing to stop you naming him as the father on the birth certificate but naming the baby with your last name. If you were married I think it's completely different. It would be very difficult for me to give the baby the dad's name - if it doesn't work out in the long run, they will always have that name. If it all does work out, it is actually not difficult to change the name legally, it is a simple form.

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    letii  (30-12-2014)

  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hers&Hers View Post
    I understand where you are coming from. I don't know the reasons why you feel like that but for me it is cultural if you aren't married the child takes the mother's name and theres no question about that. I got a lot of weird looks when I had DD as to why she didn't have her father's name or my partner's name. And just as much I have given strange looks to friends who gave their kids their fathers name without being married.

    Do what makes you comfortable but most of all talk it through with your partner so that you are both on same page.
    that's IS true , assuring he understood was no problem , so he told me he asked his mother for her blessings , and was refused . Despite the love that he has for our child he wants no fights.

    I told him that the baby will automatically have my last name, due to my family and my own beliefs , he agreed . But his mum said he can " Change it " .. Which is sneaky lol and I'm so sure that my family wouldn't be happy at all , neither would I , if that was to happen lol

    DP re-assuring me that we "will " be married just not now, but I still have not changed my mind . His family says I'm biased lol but I guess , it's what I believe in , and I'm sticking with that .

    Thank you

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Excited1 View Post
    Hi OP, I feel for you it must be a difficult position to be in. If I was not married and he had already broken an engagement previously, I would give the baby my last name. There is nothing to stop you naming him as the father on the birth certificate but naming the baby with your last name. If you were married I think it's completely different. It would be very difficult for me to give the baby the dad's name - if it doesn't work out in the long run, they will always have that name. If it all does work out, it is actually not difficult to change the name legally, it is a simple form.
    Yeah it's hard , thanks for your post
    I didn't think of the birth certificate lol of course I would 100% put him on the birth certificate , and I'm with you on that one . Of it doesn't work out and he leaves us , it would remain .. But if it does then you're right it should be simple .

    No ring , no last name , that's how I was raised . Guess there are more women that have the same say when It comes to last names thank you

  5. #14
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    Ive also always said if Im not married the baby would have my last name.
    A womans sacrifice is her body in making the baby, a mans is devoting himself to her and the child through marriage (if that is what the mother wants).
    He has to give something too, not just sperm.


    I have a hyphenated last name and Ive always hated it.

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    letii  (30-12-2014)

  7. #15
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    Default Very unhappy, please help if you have been though similar cases

    Quote Originally Posted by vampstorso View Post
    Ive also always said if Im not married the baby would have my last name.
    A womans sacrifice is her body in making the baby, a mans is devoting himself to her and the child through marriage (if that is what the mother wants).
    He has to give something too, not just sperm.


    I have a hyphenated last name and Ive always hated it.

    I guess it all comes down to commitment and TRUE love . Thank you I agree 100%

    Who wouldn' want the best for her child ? Honestly yeah he better give something and yeah I don't think I'm doin the hyphenated name either lol because it will still have my last name, last lol
    Last edited by letii; 30-12-2014 at 22:30.

  8. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Star Light View Post
    This to me sounds like a very outdated opinion.

    OP - I personally would give your child your last name. When you are the one taking your child to appointment's, registering them for school etc. etc. it makes life so much easier when you have the same last name.

    Why on Earth should a baby automatically have to take the Father's sir-name????
    Certainly not outdated, just my own. I don't see the point in giving the child her last name when she intends on marrying the father. So when she gets married she will either keep her last name or have to change the fathers. Seems like a lot of hassle that could be easily avoided.


 

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