So as a lot of you probably know I'm 8 weeks pregnant and you also probably know that Christmas is coming up! We're going to be telling our parents and their partners on Christmas day kind of as a Xmas present. We have chosen to buy each of them 'World's Best Grandpa/Nan' mugs instead of just telling them verbally.
My partner's parents have been divorced and with their new wife and husband for over 20 years, so really it's a no brainer that they will both be getting one of the mugs.
However my Dad has only been with his girlfriend for 3 years and we've never been close. Our child will definitely NOT be referring to her as Nan or grandma or anything of the sort because I don't particularly like her. Now I'm faced with the decision of whether or not I give her a mug too just to be nice...
My issue is that my late mother never liked my Dad's girlfriend (Dad got with her a month after Mum and Dad separated from a 23 year marriage, so it's understandable). I feel like if I give her this mug it will give her the wrong impression and will encourage my Dad to call her Nan or Grandma which she will NEVER be!
I feel like my mother would be turning in her grave and that I would be stabbing her in the back because when she was alive she was the best Nanna ever and her grandchildren were her world. Whether my Mum is dead or alive she will always be my children's one and only Nanna.
So I don't know what to do... Keep the peace and give the girlfriend a Mug or leave her sitting there awkwardly as Dad unwraps his?
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09-12-2014 16:02 #1
I Need Some Advice (Sort Of A WWYD)
09-12-2014 16:07 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2005
It's a tough for sure. I don't know what I would do in that circumstance. But if you don't feel comfortable with your kids calling her nan then I guess I wouldn't give her a mug.
09-12-2014 16:09 #3
Don't give her a mug, give her another present that has nothing to do with a baby?
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09-12-2014 16:11 #4
Nup. Don't do it. Don't feel pressured into. Let it come naturally if at all. I would put both the names on the gift card but only give a grandpa mug.
09-12-2014 16:12 #5
Or give her a pretty tea set or tea pot
09-12-2014 16:22 #6
I wouldn't give her a mug, it seems like something special to do with your Dad. Does your Dad know how you feel about her? Otherwise there might be an awkward conversation that day about how she's going to be a Grandma!
09-12-2014 16:26 #7
I would give her a mug that's just pretty. Nothing about nanna or anything like that. So she's not missing out on a gift, but you're not giving the impression that she will be known as nanna.
09-12-2014 16:28 #8
I wouldn't do it. If that isn't the relationship you want her to have with your child then don't get her the mug :-)
09-12-2014 16:30 #9
Anyone got any idea for Xmas presents for a 55 year old woman going on 25?
09-12-2014 17:11 #10Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
Don't give her the mug! You don't even need to give her anything. Your dad is the grandparent not her so it's not weird or mean that you don't give one to her.
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