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  1. #21
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    Default Wow... Is this one of life's hardest decisions....

    I've had an unplanned fourth baby, a bit different as my third was 18 months when I fell pregnant. My fourth is now 18 months and I obviously love her to pieces and wouldn't give her back for the world. It hasn't been all roses, I couldn't bring myself to seriously consider abortion and was in denial about the pregnancy for a long time, I had my dating scan at 16 nearly 17 weeks! I was really scared about telling everyone but everyone was so supportive, giving me plenty of baby things since I'd gotten rid of all of ours and reassuring me that I could do it, some friends and family even threw me my first ever baby shower which was lovely. I developed bad anxiety towards the end of the pregnancy that worsened in the first few months of DDs life and everything felt really overwhelming but with good support and resources I've had that under control for a while now and it's been smooth sailing ever since, I only regret that this took over in those first few months and we didn't get to enjoy them as much as we could have. So that's my story, it's probably no help to you but I wanted to let you know that no matter how hard it seems you do learn to adapt. Also, I am pro choice so I'm not actively trying to push your decision and I'm sorry if I come across that way! Good luck x

  2. #22
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    Last edited by Full House; 14-01-2015 at 10:26.

  3. #23
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    Hi OP. I want to send you really big hugs. It's such a hard decision to make.

  4. #24
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    Thank you for the continued support.

    I finally got hold of the clinic, who gave me open hours and when they do surgery, but no offer what so ever to get counselling to assist with us going through the decision making process.

    I told them we had not made a decision yet.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Hopingfornumber3 For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (12-12-2014)

  6. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hopingfornumber3 View Post
    Thank you for the continued support.

    I finally got hold of the clinic, who gave me open hours and when they do surgery, but no offer what so ever to get counselling to assist with us going through the decision making process.

    I told them we had not made a decision yet.
    Are there any family planning clinics near you? They should be able to give you the details of a counsellor.

  7. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by firsttimemum34 View Post
    Be careful of abortion counsellors. In my experience they are anything but impartial. They make money from your abortion and often give misleading information or are simply there to cut through the red tape so that you can have an abortion for 'mental health reasons'.[/

    This was not my experience.
    Please be careful with generalisations such as "often give misleading information".

    On the flip side, the counsellor I was referred to at uni was a right to lifer who showed me pictures of 6 week old foetuses. Clearly they weren't interested in making money from my abortion had I needed one.
    Don't think I will. I have loads of experience with abortion clinic counsellors and I stand by what I said. I'm not talking about all counsellors- I am talking specifically about those that work in clinics.
    Last edited by Mod-Nomsie; 12-12-2014 at 11:31.

  8. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by KaraB View Post

    Don't think I will. I have loads of experience with abortion clinic counsellors and I stand by what I said. I'm not talking about all counsellors- I am talking specifically about those that work in clinics.
    [Text deleted by Moderator]
    I'm extremely pro life but I have accepted that some people aren't and that's fine i would never intentionally put anybody down because they have a different opinion but I'm just asking that you take your time and picture your life with a fourth child. Maybe you will decide that abortion is your best option - but also you may decide not to go through with it and this new addition may bring complete happiness to your life. Hugs OP, I'm really feeling for you right now x
    Last edited by Mod-Uniquey; 12-12-2014 at 12:48. Reason: Not necessary

  9. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bambiwantsababy View Post

    [Text deleted by Moderator]
    I'm extremely pro life but I have accepted that some people aren't and that's fine i would never intentionally put anybody down because they have a different opinion but I'm just asking that you take your time and picture your life with a fourth child. Maybe you will decide that abortion is your best option - but also you may decide not to go through with it and this new addition may bring complete happiness to your life. Hugs OP, I'm really feeling for you right now x
    What a guilt filled post the first half of this is. The OP doesn't need you guilting her at this point why she makes the hardest decision of her life. Really uncool.

    ETA - that quote went weird. Obviously meant to quote @Bambiwantsababy
    Last edited by Mod-Uniquey; 12-12-2014 at 12:50. Reason: Ref to deleted text

  10. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Full House For This Useful Post:

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  11. #29
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    Hi OP, I don't want to go into too much detail however I have been faced with having to make this decision on 2 occasions. Id be happy to talk over pm if you like.

  12. #30
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    I don't think pro-lifers have any business posting on this section of the board.
    People come here for support and advice not to be guilted and emotionally tortured during their decision making process.
    Pro-choice does not equal pro-abortion, it's a judgement free movement empowering a woman's right to choose.
    I had an abortion when I was 19 for a multitude of reasons and I do not regret it for one second. The clinics, doctors and counsellors were all amazing and supportive never once trying to sway or pressure me one way or the other.

    Good luck OP. Do what is right for you and your family. Plus, you do not have to tell anyone what your final decision is, I hope you are okay x

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