Another thread got me thinking about just how many family functions we have for Christmas! From the first Christmas DH and I got together (when we were just dating), we did Christmas Eve with my family, Christmas breakfast with his Mum and lunch with his Dad and step-mum. Now we do his Mum's extended family before Christmas, Christmas breakfast with his Mum and my parents, Christmas lunch with his Dad and step-mum/his Dad's extended family and Boxing Day with my Mum's extended family. My Dad's extended family haven't caught up at Christmas for years.
Anyway, the point of all that was to ask, how do other people do it? How do you work around extended families and divorced parents, etc.? It's such an exhausting period of time rushing from one event to the next for us and I'm kind of dreading doing it this year with DS in tow even though he'll make the whole season a lot more magical!
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04-12-2014 03:19 #1
*spin off* How many family functions do you do at Christmas?
Last edited by Mod-RaryGirl; 04-12-2014 at 13:45.
04-12-2014 05:07 #2
We've had to rethink our whole approach to Xmas since having DD and given that I am generally at my busiest work wise then.
We usually swap between DHs family and mine year to year, such as lunch on Xmas day with one set of parents, with a whole day set aside for the other set of parents another time in dec, whether that's Boxing Day or NYE or just another day that suits everyone. Until quite recently a big chunk of DHs family were overseas and/or interstate, whereas now they're all living close by, which means there's more options but also more opportunities for people to feel upset if we don't start communicating early about plans. We try not to squeeze a whole bunch of activities into the one day as DD is still young and gets cranky and overtired, and it's just not worth the stress.
God help us if anyone gets divorced/remarries, that's a layer of complexity which I imagine would be very difficult to work around.
04-12-2014 07:38 #3
We have one.
My mum and Dad for dinner.
I couldn't do all the running around you do.
I need until 2 pm to do our own family traditions.
We live to far away from dhs family.
04-12-2014 07:40 #4Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2011
My family always have a big christmas with all the trimmings etc and my parents have grandchildren and now great grandchildren so we have Christmas at my parents house and the in laws/sil's/bil's are all invited so we spend lunch time together.
Next year we might have it at ours, but we will see. Our dd is the only grandchild on my husbands side so I guess it's easy for us atm.
04-12-2014 07:43 #5
Generally two.. One with my family (which is small) which is now centred around DD as no one else has kids so they come to us. Sometimes this is Xmas eve depending on what works for everyone.
And one with the ILs which is with a little more extended family, but is usually a brunch on Xmas day so that everyone (cousins, partners etc) can coordinate their own thing later in the day.
I like the balance, it's a trip out to the in laws but not too much running around.
This year the answer is basically zero though! Baby arriving a week before Xmas = not leaving the house and not having anyone more than my mum drop around to do morning present opening with DD!
04-12-2014 07:52 #6
I'm lucky that with my 3 siblings we've always had xmas day with mum and dad - breakfast and lunch always and now my brother does dinner with his wife's family but xmas has always been mega important to my dad and my brother and his family comes up from melbourne every xmas and when my sister was overseas she would fly home for Xmas and as we all have our own businesses it was the one holiday we can guarantee the whole family had the day off so thankfully everyone's in laws have just accepted it - we do Boxing Day with DH family - his sister did bring it up doing Xmas lunch one year and DH just said no as he knows how important it is to my family!
04-12-2014 08:00 #7
Growing up it was lunch with dad's side of the family and dinner with mum's side of the family.
Now my parents and I live away from the rest of our family and I'm with dh, so it's changed a bit.
We alternate, so one year my family travels up here and we spend most of the time with them, only going to dh's parents for the arvo and the other year my parents go back to our home town so dh & I spend the whole day with his family.
This year is dh's family, so we will have an early xmas dinner with my parents before they leave.
04-12-2014 08:10 #8
We alternate between families each year. This year is DH's family so we'll go spend the week around Christmas up in queensland with them 😒. After that DD and I will head to Tassie to visit my family.
04-12-2014 08:14 #9
Growing up we'd do just the immediate family on Christmas day, and then have the extended family all come over on boxing day for a major get together.
Since Dad and Grandma both died we don't really see our half siblings much anymore and boxing day pretty much got cancelled.
These days, normally my mum comes over Christmas eve and stays the night, we all open presents Christmas morning here, and then all of us (including my mum) head to DH's parents house for the rest of the day. Then we often make a trip out to my brother/sil/niece's house, as they moved out west a few hours away, for a couple of nights including new years eve.
This year we're doing things different, my mum is going out west to stay with my bro over Christmas, and we're going down the coast with DH's family for the xmas week. Looking forward to it no ones upset about doing things different this year, we like to shake things up
04-12-2014 08:51 #10
2 -one with my parents/sister/BIL, one with MIL/SIL. DP's dad lives too far away, so generally every second year we go up there for Christmas, and only have the one do with them.
As a kid it was only immediate family - we didn't have much to do with extended family. I love that DD gets to spend the time with her extended family, even if it's still small by many peoples' standards!
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