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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default 4yo ds behavior? Long.

    I have a beautiful little 4yo ds, he is always been a bit of a handful. He is very emotional he is either very happy or very sad and is very expressive wether he is crying ( cries a lot) or telling me he loves me or I'm beautiful multiple times a day.
    He can be the kindest boy in the world just the other day he helped an older lady with her shopping, and is the best big brother in the world to his sister. He is very confident and social always talking to shop assistants and anyone who wants to chat. On the other hand at home he follows me around and doesn't leave my side, I have to be playing with him or he just doesn't play unless he has friends over. It's always been like this I put it down to being a "mummy's boy" he loves dh but not like he loves me. I can't go anywhere without him without, a full on melt down.
    He is deviant, back chats and just doesn't listen or care about consequences. He gets time out for punishment.
    He goes to daycare twice a week and also will be there again next year mainly due to speech, which isn't that bad but has problems with pronouncing L and R.
    His behavior has always been good at school until lately teachers say he has started to get too rough with the boys wrestling and beginning to back chat them. Today I picked him up and she said he had been "testing" them most of the day, she then caught him throwing moblio through the gates. Could I take him out there with a plastic bag and pick it up so we did. There was about 20 pieces ds refused to pick it up saying he didn't do it. After a bit he helped I questioned the teacher again and she said no he may not have thrown it all out but she did see him throw one piece. When we got home he admitted he through one but that was all.
    Is this "usual" 4yo behavior or something more and worth seeing someone?
    Dh had ADHD as a child and thinks ds may have it. Thanks for reading......

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
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    I found four/five to be quite challenging with my DS1. He really began to push the boundaries and was defiant, aggressive and bloody full on! He's also a very emotional, passionate person - very loving but geez he was hard work.

    I was told that boys often experience a testosterone surge at approx 4/5 which really fuels those grr boy urges. We just continued to be firm and consistent in our behaviour expectations but we also bought him a punching bag and DH made a real effort to do more physical stuff - kicking the footy, wrestling etc...because DS seemed to be craving that rough housing sort of behaviour but had to be taught and reminded what was ok and what wasn't. He'll be seven in Feb and he's still a crazy dude but much easier to get along with - happier, more agreeable and much more able to regulate his emotions and behaviour and I think that just takes time.

    So after that essay lol, I do think what you have described is pretty age appropriate but I always think it's a great idea to follow your instinct and if you think there might be something else at play, I'd make an apt with your GP and have a chat.

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    chickenfoot83  (28-11-2014)


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