Just wondering peoples thoughts on age gabs between siblings and if you aimed to have certain age gaps between your kids or more 'what happens, happens' ?
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28-11-2014 10:27 #1Junior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2014
Age gaps between siblings, thoughts ?
Last edited by Lacy25111; 28-11-2014 at 11:37.
28-11-2014 10:54 #2
I think in your situation the security of the new relationship is more important than age gaps between siblings, in my opinion. I wouldn't want to rush in to immediately having a baby with a new partner.
It sounds like there were several other factors that contributed to you and your sibling growing apart than just age, hopefully you can learn from that experience regardless of the age gap your kids end up having.
28-11-2014 10:54 #3
Hi... I have 15 years between my kids... wasnt intentional however when xdh and I split up I was never have any more children. 13 years later I met DP and decided we would like a child together. DD is 14 weeks, my DS is 15 and DP also has a DD who is 10. I was concerned about how DS would cope with having my time monopolised by a baby because he has had me to himself all his life. He absolutely adores his baby sister he is so protective of her. She had him wrapped around her little finger since the day he met. DD is in hospital at the moment and is texting me flat out asking how she is and whats going on. DSD who is 10 took a month or so to get used to it but now she just adores her too. I think it was more that she doesn't live with us and is only with us on alternate weekends.
We are deciding whether or not to have another one next year but we'll see.
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28-11-2014 11:24 #4
We have large age gaps in my family due to two marriages. My two older sisters (half sisters from my dads first marriage) are 12 years and 7 years older than me. I also have a sister who is 7 years younger than me. (I'm 28) So from oldest to youngest there is 19 years.
The older two lived with their mum and spent weekends with us while they were still young. After they finished school they always made time to spend with us and take us out.
We are all very close. Great friends in fact. We don't have an issue with our ages nor do we find it difficult to be close. We all make an effort and I think that makes all the difference. All of us try to be in each other's lives and be supportive of each other. Large age gaps have never been an issue for us
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28-11-2014 11:42 #5
I'm not sure if anyone "plans" to have a 13 month age gap. It was crazy and I spent the first few years sleep deprived and in tears much of the time but I'm totally loving the age gap now their older.
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28-11-2014 11:45 #6
For me if was when I felt ready for another and that happened around the time ds turned two. There is 2yrs 11mths between ds and dd and there bond is amazing but I don't think it really comes down to age.
I am the youngest in my family by 9yrs after the last and 18 years after the first and a few in between and I have an amazing bond with all of my siblings.
28-11-2014 12:29 #7Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2010
My sister (same mum, different dad) and I have a 15 year age gap and my brother (same mum & dad) and I are only 1 year apart.
When we were younger my sister would always show us nothing but love but once I hit 16, around the time she had her son (my nephew) it was like she started to show she was very jealous of my brother and I, though I think she may have always felt like this. When my mum got divorced with her dad, my grandma took care of my sister overseas, once my grandma passed away she came to Australia to live with us & I think she may have gotten very use to being an only child.
I think large age gaps can definitely work, I just think in my situation the circumstances didn't work out in a positive way.
Because of what I have experienced I have always wanted my children to be close in age & I am pregnant with my second & my children will be 18 months apart 😱....
But I think you definitely need to be ready in your relationship, so that then new baby can come into a positive family & whatever the age gap, that the older siblings also feel that positivity.
28-11-2014 12:41 #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2005
I have a nine year old, a seven year old and a three year old and all the different gaps have been lovely and they (so far) have lovely relationships with each other.
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