Op I just want to say how sorry I am he is putting you through this when it should be an exciting time for you all. What a totally selfish d$$k!!!!
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07-11-2014 18:39 #61
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07-11-2014 18:43 #62
@Serenity Love woah woah his behaviour is so totally out of line. Sorry you're going through this - is there anyone in his family you can talk to who will drum some sense into him and tell him how close he is to losing you?
07-11-2014 18:45 #63
07-11-2014 18:48 #64
I haven't read the whole thread, but I would get his phone and reply "This is the wife, f&#k off, don't mess with my family and you don't wanna mess with me!"
07-11-2014 18:53 #65
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07-11-2014 19:11 #66
I had a similar experience even down to the traumatic first labour of my ds. I chose to labour my dd without her dad and I had the labour that I wanted. FOB didn't need to be there. I found it so empowering. My neighbour was on standby. She came over to sleep next to my ds at 5.30am (had prepped him for it to maybe happen) then took him to daycare. I had his dad pick him up from there. I had my dd and 2 days later I was home. I did what I needed to do and coped fine (choosing to cosleep for my sanity). Almost 3 years on and it was the best decision ever. Turns out my ex is a narcissist and his gf has bpd. Perfect match.
You will be just fine. Your only issue here is getting someone to look after ds. Does he go to daycare? Do you have a neighbour? Anyone? Don't think just about friends. There are others in our small circles/neighbourhoods who are willing to help if only we asked. Birth is empowering. You can do this!
07-11-2014 19:12 #67
Whether you let him stay or not, I would have him look after your son while you're in labour - it's the least he can do and asking your mother for help will just make you feel worse. Besides if you're going to separate long term he will get visits with your son anyway so you might as well utilise him now.
The lying and sneaking and repeated behaviours, not to mention overtly discussing sex with this woman would send me over the top. It's horrible timing but that just reinforces how awful his behaviour is. This and the stuff with his parents, you've said he keeps getting pulled back into their crazy through money and manipulation...
We don't know this guy or your relationship, it might be salvageable long term but the fact that he's saying he's not getting a fair deal rather than crawling on hands and knees begging forgiveness - it suggests he has no idea what he's broken, which means he's likely to break it again.
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Wise Enough (07-11-2014)
07-11-2014 19:55 #68-
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
So sorry you are going through this. What a di@k flop your hubby is! He is seriously an idiot if he thinks chatting with a chick like that is ok... An absolute moron if he thinks he can talk you into thinking it's all innocent.
It probably doesn't feel like it but your strength is showing through. Making use of the resources around you (including using your hubby as a babysitter or car seat installer) doesn't make you weak. It makes you smart.
Hang in there xx
07-11-2014 21:41 #69
08-11-2014 00:09 #70Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2012
ive just read this entire thread and OMG what I want to say about him isn't fit to be said in an open forum but I had to reply and say that you CAN do this!!
Your strength is showing even just through what you have written, you can have the birth you wanted and you can raise your beautiful little girl and your son with out having his support! You are stronger than you believe.
Good luck with everything x
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