I'm a horrible host! I feed my guests, provide clean bedding and towels but don't go out of my way change my day around for them! I just go on business as usual and if they offer to help great, if they don't well that's annoying but I'm happy to ignore them until in done doing things! It's always hubby's family who stay so that probably makes a difference to how much of a hassle I feel they are.
If it were my family staying id probably expect more because I would feel
Comfortable asking them to do things!
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07-11-2014 06:27 #71
07-11-2014 06:29 #72-
- Join Date
- Jul 2013
I hate people doing stuf when they are guests.
I however have been an extended guest a few times. I tend to clean to my standards (a lot higher then anyone elses it seems), cook and tidy afterwards as well as make sure my kids are entertained and not breaking anything.
One time this was not good enough at 28 weeks pregnant (with a a high risk pregnancy having braxton hicks and full on swelling) so they kicked us out as i would not serve the host her wine. It cost us over $1000 to fly home. (ex father in law and his wife over christmas so they could meet their grandchild for a week).
The other time i am at my in laws and they love having me stay as i am a clean freak and they are not. I even clean the insides of the cfs trucks and bake up a storm so their freezer is full. "oh no, strawberry baked cheesecake is not you fav, i will whip up a chocolate pudding too"!
07-11-2014 07:00 #73
I think you expect your guests to just know what to do. If you want help then ask. I on the other hand hate people in my kitchen when I'm home so I don't interfere in other people's houses unless asked.
wifey of hubby who is always away. mother of two girls who are always amusing.
07-11-2014 07:28 #74
07-11-2014 07:34 #75
I don't expect help, though I would find it a bit unusual if guests stayed for 4 nights and didn't once offer to help with anything at all.
Usually when people have stayed at our place (namely family) they're always quick to step in and help clean up after meals by doing dishes.
07-11-2014 08:50 #76Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2011
07-11-2014 09:04 #77
Not read any other replies but when my parents stay with us (also in 60s and I have same number of kids as you, young toddler and pre schooler) my mum does a lot. She'll cook a meal, help clean up, run around after the kids....basically like she was at her own home. My step dad does less cleaning up, but still helps a lot with kids and does cooking.
I think with close family I do expect this, it's just how we are. But other family members, no. We host them more.
07-11-2014 09:24 #78
I wouldn't expect them to help with cleaning/cooking, but it would be nice if they offered at least. If they were staying for over a week I would probably expect a little help, especially if they are adding to the washing/dishes pile.
I would be happy enough if they entertained the kids while I cooked dinner or whatever. Or maybe even assisted with bath/bedtime.
07-11-2014 09:25 #79
I must say we don't have visitors who stay too often but when they do they're pretty good. Mum and dad moved interstate last year and dad lived with us for 2-3 months while he was sorting out their house to rent. While he was here he was hardly here during the days as he was out at the house, but would still put dishes in the dishwasher, empty dishwasher, wash/dry/put away dishes that had been hand washed, strip his bed on the days I washed the sheets and then make it again and clean up after himself. He was a pretty good houseguest really. My sister has stayed with us a few times too when her DS was young (6 months and 9 months). As she had him to contend with I didn't expect much from her, but she still helped out - cooked a meal, did dishes etc. We sort of swapped jobs. I'd bath my nephew and she would do some of the chores. Worked well for me!
When I'm the guest I'd like to think I'm helpful. When I stay with my aunt & uncle (4 kids) I do try to help out with the kids as much as I can. I'll happily bath the youngest, change nappies etc, chase the older 3 into the shower, read bedtime stories etc. I'll also put dishes on the sink (my uncle is very particular about how the dishwasher is stacked so I just don't go there haha) and unpack dishwasher. I'll help with dinner and /or cook if my aunt lets me. Usually one night I'm there I'll shout dinner for everyone - Chinese, pizza etc. I keep getting asked to come back so I must be doing something right! I've also been known to iron/fold clothes and towels if there are multiple baskets stacked up. I'll tend to only do the kids stuff though. I don't want to iron business shirts the "wrong way" (I don't iron DHs because he's anal about it only being done the way his mum taught him. Suits me!).
When at Mum and Dad's I'll cook dinner, clean the kitchen and keep my space tidy. It's a small house so it's hard to get around if it's messy. Plus my nephew makes more mess than I do so I figure if anyone should clean up its my sister
07-11-2014 10:30 #80
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