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  1. #1
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    Default Spin off can you turn something down politely.

    Ok @VicPark post in the Halloween thread whether she said the child was rude amongst other nasty terms for asking to be skipped when she gave out chocolates has me wondering.

    Can you refuse a food or gift and still be polite?

    Is it better to take something and than bin or refuse nicely?

    Under what circumstances is impolite to refuse something you know you wont/can't eat?
    Last edited by LoveLivesHere; 01-11-2014 at 08:05.

  2. #2
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    This is vp's post the has me thinking



    "It's not good manners to refuse a gift. It's rude no matter how much you smile and turn on the charm."

  3. #3
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    Yes it is possible to refuse while being polite. What's not polite is another person continuing to insist once you have refused. They are either rude or my Italian relatives...
    But then once they keep insisting then yes it is easier & more polite to just accept it. But also annoying.

  4. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Electric Boogaloo For This Useful Post:

    Gentoo  (01-11-2014),HeavenBlue  (01-11-2014),LoveLivesHere  (01-11-2014),MonsterMummy  (01-11-2014),peanutmonkey  (01-11-2014)

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    I just read the quote. If it's a gift, like someone has brought you a present then in simple terms yes just accept it and say thank you. But that answer doesn't take into consideration the type of relationship you have with the person, as that can make a difference.

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    HeavenBlue  (01-11-2014)

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    A gift just take it out of politeness.

    Food, refuse politely. We refuse food all the time, I don't think it's rude and if I offer food to my kid's friends and they don't want it it's really a non issue. I saw the comment that Vicpark mentioned but I really had no problem with it. I thought it was pretty good of the kid to let Vicpark know that he wouldn't eat it so not to worry about him. Just the other week one of my children went for a play date and they mum suggested they go to McDonald's for an ice-cream. MY child told the mum that she isn't allowed McDonald's. I thanked the mum for respecting us and she told me she was so proud of my child for telling her that she wasn't allowed to go there.

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    MonsterMummy  (01-11-2014)

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    I would only ever turn something down if it was offensive ie rude, vulgar, racist, demeaning etc. otherwise smile, nod, thank them.

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    SpecialK  (01-11-2014)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    A gift just take it out of politeness.

    Food, refuse politely. We refuse food all the time, I don't think it's rude and if I offer food to my kid's friends and they don't want it it's really a non issue. I saw the comment that Vicpark mentioned but I really had no problem with it. I thought it was pretty good of the kid to let Vicpark know that he wouldn't eat it so not to worry about him. Just the other week one of my children went for a play date and they mum suggested they go to McDonald's for an ice-cream. MY child told the mum that she isn't allowed McDonald's. I thanked the mum for respecting us and she told me she was so proud of my child for telling her that she wasn't allowed to go there.
    This. I'm particular with what my kids eat and often take our own food to places.

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    See I think it polite to say so when can't or won't eat a treat as long as you do so nicely.

    I also believe you don't have to take a gift just because it offered to you.

    I don't think it's rude to decline if you say it in a nice way.

    I would hate my child to feel they had to have something just because someone offered it to them.

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    GlitterFarts  (01-11-2014)

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    On a side note with food.
    I know kids with allergies that hate to say they have them in front of their mates and prefer to just the don't like whatever it is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    See I think it polite to say so when can't or won't eat a treat as long as you do so nicely.

    I also believe you don't have to take a gift just because it offered to you.

    I don't think it's rude to decline if you say it in a nice way.

    I would hate my child to feel they had to have something just because someone offered it to them.
    Essentially I agree. I just feel more awkward saying no to a gift, but food, well it just comes down to personal preference so I really don't understand why people think that is rude. One of my children has to decline food all the time, she has multiple anaphylaxis allergies. She often just says no thanks, it's a bit ridiculous to think she has to explain that she can't eat it every time she gets offered something.
    And how far does this extend? Do you eat the sample food in the supermarket even if you don't want it because it's being offered to you? Do you have to say yes to seconds at a friend's house even though you're really full? Are you supposed to eat everything on offer at a dinner party because it was cooked for you, even if it's a food you hate?


 

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