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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by FuddyMum View Post
    My husband isn't impressed either and thinks I am letting it slide to easily with him. I don't think saying anything will make him change his plans as he has booked the cruise with his brother who he is flying down from the NT for it. But on the other hand I feel as though I should be honest with him in how it made me feel so that he considers family for once....it's an ongoing problem and one of the reasons Mum left only 4 years ago...so now I get to cop the self centred behaviour! Thanks Mum!
    talk to to him and tell him how you feel, it may not change his plans this time but HOPEFULLY he thinks a little more about your feelings the next time.

  2. #22
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    I don't think I'd mind.

    How long is the cruise for? When will he be back?

  3. #23
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    Also what is his role in the birth of your baby? Why are you so disappointed he won't be there on the day?

  4. #24
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    It wouldn't worry me in the least!

    We actually asked both sets of parents to give us space for the first couple of weeks while we settled in. DH tore shreds off his parents when they ignored us and booked flights over anyway.

  5. #25
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    I wouldn't be worried if my dad booked a holiday when I was due. It would mean he was out of my hair. Last thing I wanted when I had my kids was house guests, including my parents.

    I know different people have different relationships with their parents... Considering my own (not the best but getting better with time ) I have to ask ... As a grown adult why do you need your father around when you have a baby? Your husband is there and he can help you out can't he? Your father can always visit when he is back from holiday?

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    LaDiDah  (21-10-2014)

  7. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I wouldn't be worried if my dad booked a holiday when I was due. It would mean he was out of my hair. Last thing I wanted when I had my kids was house guests, including my parents.

    I know different people have different relationships with their parents... Considering my own (not the best but getting better with time ) I have to ask ... As a grown adult why do you need your father around when you have a baby? Your husband is there and he can help you out can't he? Your father can always visit when he is back from holiday?
    I don't "need" him around to help with the baby from a hands on approach. Of course my husband will be around to help out. I am sure that once my Dad gets back from his holiday he will visit and meet his grand daughter.
    This issue isn't coming from a practical help stand point. It's coming from my want for him to be excited, aware and wanting to meet her. Wanting to help hubby if there is any complications being contactable and wanting to be there. It feels to me that having Grandparents that are involved and making their own children and their grandchildren part of their thoughts and plans is becoming less and less the norm. It saddens me that events such as the birth of a second grandchild are easily forgotten and an after thought. Not many awesome things and events happen in life - I believe this is one for him and I hoped he would see it this way...but that is not the response I am getting. Of course I am an adult I don't need his help but I missing out on having excited involved parents and that's the bit that I feel ripped off about.

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    VicPark  (21-10-2014)

  9. #27
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    I think you might be expecting too much.

    Some people don't long for grand kids. My ILs are like that.

    They were looking forwards to retirement to spend their money on traveling and be a little care free after raising kids for over 30 years.

    They are happy to have grand children though! But they won't build their life around their births. That's the parents job.

    And maybe your dad is excited? It doesn't necessarily mean he forgot about it?

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    BbBbBh  (22-10-2014)

  11. #28
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    Wouldn't bother me.

  12. #29
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    I would most likely be relieved tbh. I would much rather have my dad not at home with me so i can bond with baby and my son could bond as well as my boyfriend if we had a baby together. Would like to get used to being a family of 4 without any interference.

    Sent from my GT-I9506 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  13. #30
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    Unless I'd spoken with him about looking after my other kids it wouldn't worry me. And if he is holidaying with your uncle maybe that was the only time they could do it.


 

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