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  1. #21
    ~Marigold~'s Avatar
    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    I couldn't read and not reply. I just cannot even begin to imagine your shock and horror.
    This makes me beyond repulsed, hearing about this kind of behaviour just sickens me.
    I'm not being helpful. I'm so sorry.

    AS for your MIL, well, look, I don't like to judge, but how the f$@k can she justify staying and supporting him?

    Me 32, He 35, DS 14, DD 2

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  3. #22
    ~Marigold~'s Avatar
    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Quote Originally Posted by Devastated29 View Post
    He's not on bail, his prison sentence has been suspended as the judge believed he was committed to rehabilitating.

    DH has read the article now and looks like he's going to throw up any minute. I have a million things going through my head.
    Oh my god, your poor DH.


    Me 32, He 35, DS 14, DD 2

  4. #23
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    Oh how hard I have nothing to add sorry but I hope you and your DH can get through it together, I think the counselling is a good idea, for either you both or him by himself. Best of luck with it all.

  5. #24
    ~Marigold~'s Avatar
    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Quote Originally Posted by Explora View Post
    I agree...allow the MIL one faux pas...she didn't ask for this and suddenly finds herself in the middle and pulled apart like a tug-o-war. Which side does she give her loyalty to? She's no doubt sickened and humiliated by FIL's actions and I don't see how she could have been thinking straight (probably still isn't, what a nightmare).

    Yes she could have chosen to be more up front, but she's not the bad guy here, IMHO.
    Yes, I agree. The MIL is also a victim in all of this

    Me 32, He 35, DS 14, DD 2

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  7. #25
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    Oh gosh I think I may have read about this before coming on here and reading this. It effects me just reading the article, so I can only imagine what you are going through. Massive hugs and strength. I agree with PP's about seeking counselling. I really wish you all the best in overcoming this.

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    I completely agree that MIL is a victim here and like I said can't imagine how hard this must be for her. It states she has been by his side through all court proceedings so yes I imagine she has known the full extent of the situation. I love her to pieces and we are close so there's no way I will be staying away from her. That said, I think it's understandable for me to be upset that she has kept this from us. They have been married a long time so I understand she must feel a loyalty. The police report that some of the fantasies he relayed to the undercover officer were about "a daughter and granddaughter". To be honest I have no idea how on earth she is able to stay by his side after knowing that. It also says he told the police officer that he sexually abused his daughter and granddaughter (and sent sordid images that he claimed was them) but that this was later found to be false.

    Anyway my point is I want to support MIL as much as I want to support DH.

  9. #27
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    Whoa.... If your MIL indeed knew the facts, stood by her hubby in court ... and *if* (not sure if this is the case?) she let your kids be around him without telling you the truth... She isn't a victim she's a dumb cow who can't be trusted.
    Last edited by VicPark; 04-10-2014 at 16:30.

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  11. #28
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    I imagine she's in a great deal of shock. I'm only going by what we've read in the article so I'm not positive of anything. But yes we have spent plenty of time together since it all began. We've stayed at their place, there has been little girls running around naked. I feel completely sick.

  12. #29
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    I'm not sure how old your children are, but seeking advice about how to handle any questions or anything the may come out with (I sincerely hope there's nothing) would be a good idea.

    I'm sorry you're having to go through this

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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Whoa.... If your MIL indeed knew the facts, stood by her hubby in court ... and *if* (not sure if this is the case?) she let your kids be around him without telling you the truth... She isn't a victim she's a dumb cow who can't be trusted.
    I'm with VP on this. MIL cannot be trusted. She has completely betrayed you, your DH and your children.



    Me 👩 36; DF 👨 34
    DS 🐢 07/02/97 DD 🐝 27/09/99
    DS 🐳 26/04/02 DD 🐞 06/09/06
    DD 🐣 Due 03/12/14

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