I have no advice, I can't imagine how you are both feeling to you and your family!!
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25-08-2014 17:54 #21
25-08-2014 18:11 #22
Oh, I really feel for you and your DH what a scary time for all of you. I'm sorry I have no advice, I have no idea what I would do or how I would cope.
I hope he agrees to let you go to be with him if you can get someone to look after the kids
25-08-2014 18:41 #23
what kind of cancer are they thinking it is?
Treatments for some types of cancer are absolutely amazing these days. The chemo/radiation and drugs are super difficult at times - but they are amazing.
It is important to stay posative. To remember that lots of people do go through this and survive it, and be determined to be one of those that do.
Doing things together as a family, and enjoying your life is important .. being grateful for the time and the life that you have.
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25-08-2014 18:41 #24
Firstly big hugs what a horrible thing to
I think its great dh is coming around re being there for test results. If that was me I would want to go for my dh but also need to go for myself if that makes sense.
Family photos are a great idea as well as one step at a time.
25-08-2014 18:54 #25
Big hugs for you and your family.
I am currently watching my dad go through his third bout of leukaemia, so some tips I have from watching him and mum are:
- Insist that you (or someone else if you can't make it) goes to the appointments with him. It can be so overwhelming that you don't take in all the information, so it is good to have a second person listening and asking questions.
- As Katies Mum said - there are amazing treatments out there, so stay positive
- Look after you - with all the focus on your DH you will probably have to take a lot on yourself. I see my mum running from appointment to appointment, making calls to keep my sister and I informed (and all the other relatives), keeping the household running etc etc and she is exhausted but doesn't feel that she 'deserves' a break because she isn't the one who is sick
- It's ok to cry - but you have to get back up again.
- Ask for help- lots of people want to help but don't know what to do. If you need a meal made - ask, if you need someone to watch the kids - ask.
25-08-2014 19:14 #26
25-08-2014 19:18 #27Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2008
Big hugs lil miss... I really hope that biopsy says otherwise... but I have a few in my family who went through cancer treatment also. I have seen that it is very very difficult at first to accept. Take one step at a time and have family outings or even go on mini holidays if you can.
You can get lots of wonderful support here and also at the hospital but you and your dh could seek professional counselling also. Just a thought...
25-08-2014 19:20 #28
25-08-2014 19:29 #29
Excellent advice given by PPs already, but just wanted to add, until you get the actual diagnosis try not to assume the worst OR look at what Dr Google says.
My Mum has advanced breast cancer. She originally had breast cancer with a small lump removed 17 years ago. She had radiotherapy and that was it, fine afterwards. Full remission. We were so relieved. Unfortunately some 14 years later it returned. Her GP told her on a Friday afternoon that it was in her bones and we spent all weekend imaging the absolute very worst. That was almost 3 years ago now and she's actually doing extremely well. Radiotherapy and drugs have come along way. A positive attitude helps. It has changed our lives and the way we look at things: every birthday and Christmas is appreciated so much more.
My thoughts are with you.
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25-08-2014 19:36 #30
yep agree @bitterpure
I have Luekaemia (CML) and have had it for 6 years now.
Treatment has been pretty awful at times - but I will be fine, and look forward to living a long and healthy life.
It can be very hard going emotionally though .. keeping positive, being happy with what you can take out of it and using the services and help that they have available is important.
Its also really important to tell people around you what is happening, and what you want from them. If you need help, accept it.
If you need for people to not ask questions etc ... tell them that. people are happy to do whatever you want, often they dont really know how to help or what to do - so if you tell them it makes it much easier for you and them
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