So my DD has always been fully bf. She wakes 3-4 times a night for feeds. The issue is that for the last 6-7 weeks she's actually upped her daytime feeds A LOT. She was only having feeds at nap times and bed time during the day. But now any time I'm sitting down she's climbing onto my lap wanting a feed. Crying if I don't respond straight away. Also if I leave her with DH for any length of time she'll demand a feed as soon as I return.
The last few days she's been refusing to unlatch at nap times once she's fallen asleep on me, waking and crying when I try, and as such she's not napping so well particularly in the morning. Nights are becoming more problematic too. She was screaming last night at 0330 when I desperately tried for her 10th time to unlatch her so I could go to sleep!!!
Any ideas or thoughts why this is happening please?
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18-08-2014 09:14 #1
Can't get 12 month old off the boob!!!
18-08-2014 09:34 #2-
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
It sounds like bub is feeding for comfort and not nutrition.?
- First of all let me say that if you don't mind feeding for comfort, or feeding to sleep then that's your call
If you want to reduce the feeds then you could either:
1) look into why bub is needing more comfort (is bub unsettled because of a change, such as your recent move?) and then addressing that as a separate issue (eg using a teddy comforter, use the same bedding from home in bubs new room etc)
2) slowly wind back on the correlation between feeding and comfort.
- Feed bub until drowsy but don't let bub fall asleep in the boob.
- Better still follow a feed-play-sleep pattern during the day (not feed-play-feed-sleep etc).
- If it hasn't been that long since bubs last feed offer bub a water bottle or snack instead, while giving a cuddle.
3) make sure bub is eating enough solids, particularly protein at night (meat lentils etc). At 12 months bub should be getting most nutrition from solids. If bub is feeding heaps for comfort, this will mean there is less room for solids. And breastmilk isn't as filling as solids so bub is waking more.
Last edited by VicPark; 18-08-2014 at 09:40.
18-08-2014 09:40 #3
Hi Bond girl,
My dd is a fair bit older than yours (18months) but I went through this recently where nursing had escalated to numerous times a day. I was going to wean (I was going to just completely stop and suck up the fallout) as I couldn't stand being nothing but a dummy, unable to sit down or just cuddle or play with dd. However, I made one last ditch attempt to set limits on nursing and surprisingly has been successful in cutting her back down to wake up, and before nap and bed. I'm hoping to slowly cut down further and have her weaned by 2 years. She still asks a lot but no longer kicks up a fuss when I say no. I did this by
- wearing a top that made access difficult
-saying no not now only bedtime and remaining firm despite the whining- the whining stopped after a couple of days
-offering a drink/snack when asking
-distract distract distract
-not sitting down (exhausting I know) to stop dd climbing on and asking
-limiting nursing to just one chair in bedroom so dd would hopefully stop associating boob with sitting down
It is a habit and it takes a while to break. She's also feeding a bit better instead of just mucking and biting on the boob.
I night weaned at 8 months following a technique of cutting down the time on each boob per feed than then a but of controlled crying so she learnt to self settle and resettle herself.
I find there's tonnes of advice on how to initiate breastfeeding and very little on how to stop. Good luck xxx
Eta: I kept hoping it was a phase or related to teething but it was getting worse and dd kept demanding it more and more over 3-4 months.
Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 18-08-2014 at 10:21.
18-08-2014 10:06 #4
It's normal for a child to increase feeds as they enter a new stage of development, I've always found the kellymom website helpful. You can read about normal toddler nursing here http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/toddlernursing/
18-08-2014 11:16 #5
I used to feed kind of on a schedule. And in a different room. And started replacing certain feeds with formula then later sippy cup then later milk in a sippy cup. But bub never fed for comfort. But maybe that's why he was never a comfort feeder, so I don't know maybe developing a feeding schedule would help? Does bub take a bottle or sippy cup?
18-08-2014 12:42 #6
Thanks for the replies. I thought at first it was due to the move but it started a couple of weeks before we even began packing!
She's not a huge eater, though sometimes surprises us and eats a lot. She's usually too busy to stop and eat and doesn't want to sit in her highchair long, or my lap, and just wants to get down. If I give her something while she's toddling around she'll eat it though!! Many times I've chased her around the room with a spoon, probably another bad habit! I do worry she's not getting enough.
I do want to stop feeding her to sleep, have been doing it a long time and it's getting too much now. I want DH to be able to get her down too. My plan is once we're settled in the new house (after a couple of weeks, just moving from temporary accommodation to new place today) to begin to address this and the frequent feeds. I think I'll distract and offer her a cup of water or milk. I also want to night wean. Arghhh so much to contemplate!
Last edited by Bond Girl; 18-08-2014 at 12:44.
18-08-2014 12:45 #7
18-08-2014 12:57 #8
@Bond Girl all of my kids have been exactly the same. It's actually one of the main reasons I've wound up weaning just after 12 months as I find it suffocating to be honest. I'm going through it with DD3 at the moment (she was one last week) and yep everytime she comes near me she wants a feed, but only ever takes little bits then wanders off then comes back and wants more. DD1 was the worst though - she used to greet me with a smile and an open mouth when she was one.
I find distraction the only thing that works. And cutting the night feeds. I was still feeding up to 3 x a night until recently. I just can't keep it up so not DH is settling her and I'm keeping away.
18-08-2014 13:19 #9
Sonja, yes little feeds and wandering off in between is EXACTLY what she does! And she feeds about 4 x overnight. I would like to keep feeding her but you're right it's suffocating when it's this much.
I'm going to start forming my plan for how to cut it back :thumbup:
18-08-2014 13:27 #10
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