I failed at bf dd.
What tips can you give to successfully bf my next. I feel I'll give in to ff knowing how easy it is and knowing my dd turned out great on formula and that I actually love ff but hated bf.
Do statistics show second time mums succeed better than first time mums. Can you please share your experiences with me.
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14-08-2014 14:17 #1Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2012
How did you successfully bf your next child?
14-08-2014 14:23 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
I'm not much help because I successfully fed DD1 but couldn't with DD2 but I honestly think the child has a lot to do with it. You can do all the research, see all the specialists, pay thousands in LC sessions, but if your child can't feed, there isn't a lot you can do.
I think it's good to be prepared though. If you’ve done your research and know to look out for certain things, know that it may be painful for the first few weeks, know that milk doesn’t come in straight away etc, you can sometimes think “I can ride this out”. A good support system is a must too! Someone to cook healthy meals and bring you water while feeding. Being relaxed definitely helps too. I was so stressed with DD2 because she was losing weight it was just a downward spiral.
ETA - I mean a general "you"
Last edited by Anjalee; 14-08-2014 at 14:26.
14-08-2014 14:32 #3
I'm following out of interest. I couldn't feed dd due to inverted nipples, bad attachment, delayed milk coming in due to manual removal of placenta and blood loss. I'm due in two weeks and already have spoken to a LC at the hospital and discussed a plan for this time, I'm expressing each day now (not getting anything out at all and not seeing a difference yet but working on it) and making sure I'm prepared with shields etc.
14-08-2014 14:35 #4
I have only had 1 child so far but he would not latch at first or would latch but lose the latch and I would spend 20 mins trying again. By 2 weeks I was feeding completely naturally successfully so here are my tips:
1) buy a breast pump before the birth and have it ready to use. Electric is best, I have the medela mini electric.
2) ask to use a breast pump in hospital and if you can't breastfeed easily, pump instead. You will then see the colostrum slowly change into breast milk which is so encouraging and you know your body is doing it's thing. Pump very frequently, hourly at least
3) 'tube' feed bub the colostrum - midwives will show you how, helps bub to stop being lazy - but after a couple of days I fed my bub breast milk from a bottle and it didn't make him lazy or make him give up breastfeeding
4) see a lactation consultant, my appointments and hire of a double pump were all free for 2 weeks. My problem was with my positioning and with bub just needing to get the hang of it - you're not the only one who has to learn, babies have to learn how to do it as well and it takes time
5) use a breast shield. BFing never hurt me but for some reason a breast shield worked when nothing else did and eventually we were feeding successfully without it. I also got one free from my lactation consultant AND the hospital (public hospital)
6) don't give up for at least 2 weeks! Don't keep formula in the house. Bub WILL survive and if you are pumping there will be milk available so no need to stress. Every time you use formula you are slowing down your milk supply as it is supply and demand.
7) I got a lot of my ideas on pumping from birth from the save our sleep book.
The answer to your problem I guess depends on why you gave up the first time - unfortunately if it is because it hurt you to do it I have no answers for that as it never hurt me - I even gave up using Lansinoh as there was no need for it.
And if you hated breastfeeding just because you didn't like the sensation I can't help there either bc I thought it was wonderful and felt like I was going to die if I couldn't breastfeed my baby. If you really hate doing it then maybe don't force yourself - I do believe BM is best BUT a sad Mummy is no way to be either. Emotions are very important, as important as physical health, maybe even more important.
One last tip - I called the midwives EVERY time I needed to feed. For 5 days. There was a different midwife every shift and they didn't once get annoyed with me. Don't be afraid to be persistent with them, they all have different ideas on how to help you and it was so good to have different perspectives. One of them even recommended dummies and bottles and told me that babies don't get attached to those things until a month old. The hospital arranged my lactation consultant appt for me.
Last edited by Eilonwy; 14-08-2014 at 14:44.
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14-08-2014 15:12 #5
14-08-2014 15:13 #6
I could not get it with #1, and when pregnant with #2, had the attitude that if I could BF her, that was great, and if not, whatever. I had seen one healthy kid raised on formula, and knew it wasn't the end of the world.
I think the fact that I put less pressure on myself contributed A LOT to my successful BFing of #2. The other thing that helped was that I knew going in that it wasn't necessarily going to be easy. No one told me with my first baby that sometimes it's hard, so I had false expectations I think.
So for me, all about state of mind.
14-08-2014 15:17 #7
14-08-2014 16:04 #8
I had huge issues with my DS1 due to flat nipples and low supply, I lasted 6 weeks of expressing and trying to feed before giving up as we just weren't getting anywhere...
DS2 however was a different story, he is 12 weeks today and is fully BF without shields. I hand expressed 24 hours prior to bub arriving I also started taking motillium on the second day after he was born. Had Herbs of Gold Lactation Support pills, lactation cookies to help with supply. (I have now weaned off all except the cookies as they taste so good)
My nipples changed a bit in my second pregnancy and came out a bit more. I was expressing for the first few weeks as my DS2 was in special care nursery. I think he just got it and knew what to do, my DS1 just didn't seem to get the hang of it and totally attacked my nipples to the point of bleeding..
I have a good quality hospital grade pump this time around the Specta S2, last time I had the Medela Mini Electric and I hated it.
Other than that I can't think what else I did differently.
Good luck and whatever you decide, is the right decision for you and your baby.
16-08-2014 19:36 #9Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2012
16-08-2014 19:56 #10
I didn't manage to BF DS but expressed for about 4 months. I was determined that I was going to BF DD and did the following:
- Was absolutely bloody minded about BF'ing.
- Followed the "feed at every squeak" mantra. This means that every time bubs looked remotely like she wanted a feed then she got it. She had absolute access to boobs at any time.
- I learned to feed lying down in bed so I could feed and sleep - this saved my sanity as it turned out DD fed pretty much non-stop night and day.
- DH was on board and supported me
- I was also a member of a different forum where I had my dedicated thread on how it was going and people could post supportive messages for me. I could rant and rave and say how much I hated it, how much it hurt, etc but it was a brilliant strategy because I had a little cheer squad
- DD had formula a few times (eg she was born just before xmas and the family still all came over on xmas day. I did not want to feed DD in front of the family as I was still very much on my L plates so I had some formula prepared. I recognised that every time I gave her formula I may be making my life more difficult as she may prefer it). The last time I gave her formula she was about 3 months old and she ended up vomiting it all back up over my bed.
- I went to ABA meetings to normalise the situation
- I was lucky enough to have an awesome clinic nurse who was also an LC who was another cheer squad for me
I was also a lot more confident at holding a baby and looking after a baby with DD which made things a little easier. I went on to BF her until she was 18 months old.
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