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  1. #41
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    I never understood being with someone who either you didn't love or didn't love you, it's not fair on anyone involved

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    Quote Originally Posted by loislane2010 View Post

    He is a great dad and usually a great husband but when you know your not what he expected of a wife or that hes not attracted to you physically, its an issue right!!!
    I'm pretty sure the way he's acting is not what you expected in a husband either.

    I agree with pp.
    Call him on his hurtful comments. He is not playing fair and is emotionally playing you. You deserve to be treated better.

  3. #43
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    Gothel is offline Skip the drama, stay with Mama!
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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    I never understood being with someone who either you didn't love or didn't love you, it's not fair on anyone involved
    Maybe I've picked you up wrong but that's very simplistic, life's just not like that. Of course it's not fair but none of us get into a relationship thinking "he doesn't love me". It always starts out well and if it goes downhill there's a world of pain before you get to rock bottom and separation. You can't just wake up one morning and think "this is cr@p, I think I'll leave". I think most of us would think "this is cr@p, how can I fix it". Especially when you have kids together joined finances, living arrangements, social life, not to mention all the emotional investment in Happily Ever After.

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  5. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gothel View Post
    Maybe I've picked you up wrong but that's very simplistic, life's just not like that. Of course it's not fair but none of us get into a relationship thinking "he doesn't love me". It always starts out well and if it goes downhill there's a world of pain before you get to rock bottom and separation. You can't just wake up one morning and think "this is cr@p, I think I'll leave". I think most of us would think "this is cr@p, how can I fix it". Especially when you have kids together joined finances, living arrangements, social life, not to mention all the emotional investment in Happily Ever After.
    I know many people who are only with their partners for convenience, and have openly stated this. How is this fair on anyone?

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  7. #45
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    I guess the point is it can't be/isn't always about fair. Sometimes people try and do the best they can with the situation they're in.

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  9. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    I never understood being with someone who either you didn't love or didn't love you, it's not fair on anyone involved
    Sadly it's not always that easy to just pack up and leave and is easier to just stay and put up with it. I know when I wanted to leave I slept In my car for 3 nights...that was very hard so I just went back home.

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    OP what he's done and doing is breaking you down and in the same breath building himself up. You are feeling lower and unworthy but he seems stronger and desirable - in a sense. He wants you to be afraid to leave him because you think you aren't good enough. In fact he is afraid of you leaving because he knows he's not good enough.
    I really suggest you go and get some counselling to help you rebuild you and then you can see what you want to do about your husband. Sometimes they realize when their wives stop being hurt that they are losing and will try to turn it around and work on themselves. And sometimes they don't and you are strong enough to make the next move.
    He doesn't respect you at all and sadly you already know it and you seem to accept it. I'm very sorry. please find someone to talk to and you can begin to work on you without him breaking you down.


 

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