I just need to get this all out, as I am honestly not coping.
2014 is absolutely sh!t. In less than 5 months I've had my mum die suddenly of a heart attack at the young age of 44, then I was replaced at work whilst still grieving and subsequently lost someone I thought was a close friend because of it, had a suspected miscarriage (which is just a huge slap in the face since I've struggled with infertility for so long), then DP's nan who raised him passed away of ovarian cancer, DS's additional needs have become more evident and he's likely to be placed in a support class as of next year, and on top of it all we're being evicted from our home.
It's just way too much in such a short time frame. How am I meant to pick myself back up when it's just one blow after another??
I've suffered from depression since I was 15, my mum was always a major support for me through my depressive episodes, and she was always there to give wise advice to me and to help with DS. Without her here I am struggling - I feel alone, lost, without a sense of direction. She was my best friend, life feels so empty without her. I don't know where to turn anymore. I don't know how to fix up my life. I am just so scattered and disorganized. I have days where just the simplest of tasks feel like too much of a burden. I've completely neglected my studies and will have to start all over again. My life is one big mess.
I saw my dr a few months ago and got a referral to a psych, but I'm scared to follow it up. I know I need to though. It just seems like a really scary step...
I just wish something positive would come our way this year.
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23-07-2014 08:40 #1
Worst year ever - crumbling....
Last edited by ~ElectricPink~; 15-04-2015 at 09:43.
23-07-2014 08:53 #2
Oh loads of hugs to you
I don't know what it is about this year but I don't know anyone who's had a good year of it so far.
I won't go into details but the list is endless between us here and family and friends back home.
It kicked off on New yrs day and just hasn't let up since.
None of us can wait for this year to be over.
Just take your time in doing what needs to be done, process what's going on especially with your mam's passing, which I'm very, very sorry to hear, my condolences.
I lost my Dad when he was 38!
Ridiculously stupid age to go.
I ran away from the grief for a good ten years then went off the rails for a bit while working through the loss.
I can't offer any advice on seeing the psych, maybe some one else who knows the process can offer advice there.
Love and hugs X
23-07-2014 08:56 #3
I'm so sorry you're having such an awful time. Please follow up the psych referral, I promise it will be helpful. Try to take things one day or one hour at a time. Your DS sounds like he will be being supported so try to put that aside now and organise moving. See someone at your school to put studies on hold or see how they can support you. It sounds cliche but - write a list and prioritise what needs to happen this week, month and year. Tackle things as they come up. You won't feel like this forever
23-07-2014 08:58 #4
I am so sorry to both of you for having such a bad year! It's scary going to a psych but you'll be so grateful that you did, @~ElectricPink~. I don't have the answers for how you keep going but you just do, you take one day at a time and tackle one problem at a time.
23-07-2014 09:00 #5
Big hugs to you. I'm so sorry that all these things have happened - in particular so close together. That would be so hard for everyone to deal with.
I wanted to say that I've been through a really hard patch in recent times and I really wondered how I was going to get through it but time passes and things get sorted slowly and before you know it you can look back at how strong you have been and what you've achieved.
I think going to the psych is a great step - or perhaps having another chat to your GP.
Letting it out in here in a good thing - I find the more honest I am - with others and myself - the closer I get to recovery.
Little steps seem more manageable.
I hope that life gets much easier for you really soon.
23-07-2014 09:08 #6
Hugs to you OP, what a tough year you have had. I think that calling and making the psych appt would be a really good first step. I get that it's a big thing and can be really scary, but it also has the potential to really help. If you are feeling like you just can't do it could you ask your DP to do it? or even head back to your GP and let them know you are struggling to take that first step - they may make the call for you. Are you on meds for your depression? If not, it could be worth discussing with your GP....and if you are on meds, keep checking in with them or your psychiatrist to make sure they are well managed to help you through this tough patch.
I would definitely give your uni/TAFE a call and let them know you need some time off. Your GP might be able to help with some medical approved leave if needed. Be kind to yourself - you have been through alot and it's no surprise that you are finding it challenging.
Do you have friends to support you, emotionally and practically?
23-07-2014 09:13 #7
I'm so sorry that you're having a rough time of it. In terms of your losses, it's hard enough when one of those things happens but when it all happens in the space of a year, or even a few months, it seems insurmountable.
The best thing you can do for yourself and your family right now is to follow up the psych referral. I know that it feels like a big step, and the idea of opening up to a stranger is really scary, but this is what they're trained to help with. Just know that it's a safe space where no one is judging you. The psych will be able to teach you techniques to help you get through this. I've seen a psych off and on for many years. When I was younger it was a weekly thing; now it's on an as needed basis. It has been so beneficial for me in terms of surviving the rough patches and has helped me work through a lot of issues that I'd shoved aside. I can't stress enough how important it is to take that first step, you will feel better for it.
I agree with babyla, break down all the things you need to do into the next hour or day. Lists are great but just know that you don't need to tackle every single thing on the list at once. By prioritising things realistically you'll feel more organised and as you start working through the list you'll get satisfaction from small achievements.
23-07-2014 09:20 #8
It's no wonder you are completely overwhelmed. You are emotionally dealing with so much, on top of that being evicted. Stress overload. I'm sorry for the loss of your loved ones. Sounds like your mum was a wonderful support, it's completely understandable that you feel lost without her
I have a friend who has had enormous amounts of sh!tty things happen to her and her family, mostly serious health issues. It is extremely hard on a daily basis, but regular sessions with a good counsellor help her immensely.
Agree with others, organise your appointment with the psyc ASAP. It's too much to deal with on your own. I second the idea of writing down a list and prioritising what needs to be done. You can do this.
23-07-2014 10:38 #9
Thank you so much for your support everyone, I truly appreciate it x
Just a quick reply for the moment, as I'm about to head out - I couldn't find the details for the psych, but I've made an appointment to see my dr for this afternoon to discuss it all with her and get some assistance with everything. I've kind of come to the realization that I simply cannot deal with all of this alone, and nor should I have to.
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23-07-2014 10:46 #10
Hugs EP I feel the same. Except I can't afford to see anyone. I would of loved to goto a mental unit but I'm too ashamed that's how dumb I am. Plus hubby can't take time off for dd.
If you want to PM feel free too.
There are often support groups at community centres too
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