Apologies for the long post first of all. I just need to get this all off my chest.
I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 19 (I'm now 33). DH n I conceived naturally DS who is now 2. We've been trying for over 12 mths unsuccessfully to get preg when we finally went into the docs and was referred to Monash IVF on the gold coast
Multiple blood tests and a concern of CAH (Adrenal gland issues) it has been determined even though I've got a regular cycle I'm not ovulating. Dr predicts I'm not going to have a period and for the first time in my LIFE I've missed a period! So ive started on Clomid last week.
I was told is have issues at 19 and after having DS I thought it'd be ok. But now I know I'm the cause I'm starting to feel extremely guilty and down. I know we are on the rd to fixing it but this is all so new and scary to me.
I'm on day 4 of Clomid and had an extreme day yesterday of intense headaches (nothing to then). After that I forgot to take my tablet toys morning so have taken it 11hrs later than normal but at least the same day.
DH is being amazingly supportive of me and how I'm feeling but I can't shake this awful feeling of failure
Had anyone had this? How did you deal with it? I feel bad dumping on hubby all the time
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21-07-2014 21:14 #1
Infertility.... PCOS... and feeling Guilty
21-07-2014 21:36 #2
I know how you feel. I have severe pcos. Heaps of cysts on my ovaries. I made sure I told my husband when we met that it might be hard for me to conceive. I got pregnant 5 years later after trying for 3.5 years....naturally! !! And although I am not happy to admit this I was quite overweight when I did. 169kgs. I had a perfect pregnancy but did have a c section. Well my son is now 3.6 years old and we have been ttc since he was born. No luck. Unless I lose a lot of weight I won't get any help from anyone. So till then we'll just continue on as normal as when I get I had no idea. No idea I had ovulated and no idea I was pregnant till around 6-7 weeks. I just hold onto hope I can conceive again naturally or that I can get my weight sorted as I'm 36 this year and already have fertility barriers as well as age.
It's hard cause I feel guilty on and off but my husband doesn't out pressure on me cause he knows it's not in our hands. I hope your husband is considerate too
21-07-2014 22:05 #3Member
- Join Date
- May 2014
I completely understand the guilt. I have PCOS with an AMH of over 150 and huge amounts of follicles... My husband is perfect in terms of fertility so it is all me in that respect. However he suffers from anxiety and our (my) fertility issues have made it much worse. I constantly feel like his anxiety is my fault - everytime he can't sleep, everytime he hyperventilates or fidgets.
We are now 13 weeks preggo after 12 months of ttc but his anxiety is still lingering and so is my guilt.
27-07-2014 00:33 #4
Thanks ladies is nice to know I'm not alone.
I'm very lucky I probably have the most amazing husband who is my rock. But he can't fully understand what I'm going through and how I feel.
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31-07-2014 00:01 #5
I'm currently being tested for CAH and I'm really scared! I thought it affected your children as the specialist said if I have it I'd need to have IVF to test the embryos before implanting them so the babies don't have issues?
I was diagnosed with pcos at 22. I didn't think much of it until we started TTC and I stacked on the weight and turned into a Zitty, oily, hairy blob! I've had so many tests and so many more issues have come out of the woodwork, it seems pcos is just the tip of the iceberg!
31-07-2014 06:39 #6
We were told it is a matter of meds ( for life) for you and then your infertility problems are over. ... and then it's another kind of specialist that looks after you.
Fingers crossed for you that you get a negative. Though it's good he's testing for it. .... my gyno said it's quite often a lot don't check at all for it. Fingers crossed its not for you.
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By CleverClogs in forum General ChatReplies: 3Last Post: 27-09-2013, 14:20
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