The first 4 days were the hardest for me. Write down all the reasons you don't want to smoke anymore. And I agree with Surprised. I suspect he is subconsciously trying to sabotage you, bc you giving up means the pressure is on him to give up.
Hang in there. I promise it gets better.
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02-12-2014 19:37 #51
02-12-2014 19:40 #52
02-12-2014 19:41 #53
02-12-2014 19:45 #54
Are you using an aid? I tried several times to give up cold turkey and it was a total failure. The inhaler was the thing that helped me. I smoked the first day of the inhaler, then cut the smokes and just used it, then 4-5 days later cut the inhaler after weening myself.
Quitting smoking is so bloody hard. Try not to be too hard on him. He's addicted as well and is struggling with cravings. Maybe you should both look at using patches or the inhaler?
Last edited by delirium; 02-12-2014 at 19:47.
02-12-2014 19:50 #55
I am thinking I'm being to angry at him. You are right. It's hard. I just want him to be happy with me but he isn't showing that
02-12-2014 19:55 #56
All these emotions are normal. I haven't had a fag for 18 weeks and I still have moments I want one. The first week is key. Once you know you've got that far you know you can keep going.
What about champix? It sounds like he can't do it cold turkey and he is the weak link here. My advice is to get him some kind of aid so he can stay on the horse so you can.
02-12-2014 20:12 #57
Hang in there!!! Remember each craving takes five minutes and then passes. Set a timer. Make a cuppa. Water your plants. Have a shower.
And, just gently saying, take it easy on your DH. It's ok to stumble. Quitting cold turkey is rough. Maybe if you just tell him you understand and you are proud he went so long then he'll get back on the quitting pony with you again. I do know how hard it is trying to quit when someone else is smoking.
And remind him to take it easy on you too as your mood is likely to be not great for the first couple of days. When you get to Day 4 it all becomes much easier.
02-12-2014 20:35 #58
Thank you ladies. I've decided to just go to bed n go away from him. He's being negative and it's upsetting me.
I've asked him before if he'd go on champix (he's tried patches, gum, inhaler and mist to no success) but he refuses, saying he doesn't need it.
I am being too harsh on him, I see that. He just won't accept my moods swinging like this. He seems to think I should be composed the whole time.
Just gotten through 48 hours smoke free. Feel like I'm dying but I want to keep going
02-12-2014 20:40 #59
You are at the hardest part. I found 48 hours was the worst bit. He really needs to try everything he can. You have tried various aids but you are so far doing cold turkey successfully. He isn't. Therefore the onus is on him to get on champix to ensure he not only quits for him but doesn't pull you down.
Yes he deserves some room for compassion and patience, but you deserve a partner who isn't sabotaging you. I see both sides
02-12-2014 20:45 #60
I realise I've probably been really horrible for the couple of days but I'm trying to keep it in check. He just lets loose. Oh I will see his side in a couple of days when I'm done hating the world, he is a lovely guy just really cranky with me at the moment.
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