Oh I'm with you Mrs Tickle! I'm in the exact same place!
For years all I ever wanted to do was have a baby and be a SAHM.
8 months into it I'm totally over it.
While I don't want to put DD into care the never ending housework, cooking, laundry has me bored out of my brain.
I feel like my IQ has shriveled to 0.
Mothers group, all we talk about is babies.... Aaarrrggghh
Even if we didn't, with the mundane days and the sleepless nights I can hardly string sentences together most days.
You are a wordsmith though Mrs Tickle. Maybe you could blog for websites and be a WAHM. Stimulate your brain a little that way?
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10-07-2014 08:06 #11
10-07-2014 08:06 #12
Oh my I can relate to this so much. I've reached the point where I long to work. I need to work again for my own mental health, as well as financially.
I've had a few people tell me to just get a part time job - but its not that easy to just go out and get a job. Especially when you've been out of the workforce for so long. Referees have moved on. Confidence erodes away. In some fields ageism is alive and well. And part time work is sought after. I've been trying and so far no joy. Not to say just give up. I've been studying and am almost finished, and hopefully that will lead to a job. And I volunteer. But sometimes people are stuck in the SAHM role because their options have dried up and that's something that's not often recognised. And it's a horrible, hopeless feeling.
OP, I hope things improve for you.
10-07-2014 08:13 #13
"I wish The Wiggles would go and wiggle themselves to death, I wish to god Thomas the Tank Engine would roll off a pier and die, Bookaboo could read a fkg book and get over it and The Wot Wots...well I'm sure there's an institution for them somewhere."
this is actually made me lol! Like the others have said, maybe a career in writing is something you should investigate? You are very very talented.
I can relate to a lot of what you wrote as well. We are pregnant with our third and sometimes the realisation that I will be out of the workforce for almost 10 years by the time the youngest is in school is not only daunting but depressing. My husband also does not like the idea of daycare, but I think if I explained to him that it would benefit the children and me he would agree to one or two days a week. I really encourage you to chat to your DH about putting the kids in care again, surely one or two days isn't really like handing over your parental responsibilities? You would still be the main parent to them 90% of the time.
I too gave up mothers groups etc because apart from having children the same age we had zero in common. Now I just make an effort to leave the house once a day if possible. Even just to go to the shops or the park or my MILs house. Getting out of the house is what makes me feel more connected to the world. If I'm in our little bubble of mess and tantrums at home for too long I just want to cry.
Big hugs, i think you will find lots of us SAHMs can relate in some way.
Last edited by GingerKat; 10-07-2014 at 08:15.
10-07-2014 08:45 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2014
OP just want to say I totally relate.
10-07-2014 09:01 #15
I'm a sahm too, coming up to 7 years now and I can also relate to a lot of what you said. However I had a conversation with a mum at playgroup about 5 years ago that had forever coloured my view of sahm. She got in my face and insisted that mums who go back to work are selfish beasts, that all they need to do is cut costs and make sacrifices because if they don't stay home to look after their children then they are just terrible parents. I'll never forget her body-blocking me and straining her neck out saying "Don't you think???"
Well no I DON'T think actually. I think I'm incredibly lucky to be able to afford to stay home and look after my kids while still being able to pay the mortgage, bills and put food on the table. My dh works a stressful job so I can do this. I'm looking forward to going back to work next year so I can get a salary again but I'm quietly terrified about how my mushy brain will manage, considering I can't remember a shopping list and often forget what day of the week it is.
So yeah, while some aspects suck, overall I'm very lucky. Loved your post though OP. Why is it that Thomas lives on an island yet has never run of the pier???
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10-07-2014 09:27 #16
Oh amen to that! I don't do the whole SAHM thing well! It's been just over 12 months for me this second time around and I am in despair! I want to go back to casual teaching but dd is so clingy that it depresses me.
I don't do mothers group or play group because to be honest, I didn't want the pressure of being judged on my ****ty clothes that no longer fit me. Yes, that's how petty I am. Dd gets no social interaction from outside the greater family because I'm worried about what people will think of my outfit of choice.
My house is a bomb at the moment, because its school holidays and i would rather play with my kids than clean. I don't even care anymore!
Op, that was a well-written piece (so much so I had to check whether you were a regular member and not a copy-paste spammer type person!)
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10-07-2014 09:43 #17Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2013
Beautifully written OP. I have nothing to add...you've said it effing perfectly.
10-07-2014 09:46 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2013
Subbing to read when I have spare time!
10-07-2014 09:46 #19
You definitely have a way with words. I loved reading that!
I partly agree with you.. because for me some days it does suck but others make up for that and I love it.
"Insert witty signature here"
10-07-2014 09:50 #20
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Mrs Tickle (11-07-2014)
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