I posted this in another thread but thought it relevant here too. I can cope with doing it all on my own and not getting as much as what I wanted done but it makes it so much worse getting criticised ! DH has very physical job and is tired he comes home and if he sees toys scattered will pick em up then start grumbling how I spoil kids letting them have toys ??? Then does a huff while changing DS nappy as I'm breastfeeding and didn't change him before hand. And then says don't worry darling look I'm helping you, I think yes and your writing it down too. have a 5 year old, 3andhalf yr old, nearly 2 year old, 7 month old n I'm preg. all at home with me no school or care and I get the hmmm look from inlaws and husbands family when they do a surprise drop by during the day like my house should be sparkling! I don't stop and I get my house looking sparking only for it to be undone in 5 min and when I mention that to DH family they say really why are your kids like that - and it rubs off on DH and drops comments about the house arrrrg @&);4"?
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23-10-2014 10:01 #101
23-10-2014 10:08 #102
23-10-2014 10:19 #103
Don't worry I haven't met anyone who didn't find their first too the hardest. It's hard having one it's hard having 10. Obviously more work with the more you have but having any number of kids are tough. It's hard but I try and cope by reminding myself - there is always someone worse off than me. I will have 10 min of yelling and 3 seconds later in ore sitting on the floor with my kids watching my kids play together then 10min later I'm back to huffing. I hope my kids don't look back and think what a witch.
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23-10-2014 10:28 #104
23-10-2014 10:42 #105
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23-10-2014 10:50 #106Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
I agree wholeheartedly. Having kids took away my identity and I struggle to play second fiddle to DP ( not that everyone does, just how I feel in the dynamics of my relationship).
I look forward to a time where I can move on from this chapter. I look forward to my children seeing me work and being able to experience more of the world with them.
23-10-2014 12:48 #107
23-10-2014 13:00 #108
Oh OP your post was sooo cute. I'm sorry if that sounds like a bad thing to say it's just how it struck me
Don't worry! Theres advantages and disadvantages to both working and not. Judging is the only bad thing. Your personality matters as to whether you enjoy staying at home or not, plus circumstances change (as have yours) and it's definitely time for jobs/day care for you! And in no way should you feel that as a SAHM you shouldn't complain. Everyone, even the richest person with the perfect family and no problems still is allowed to complain and to FEEL.
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