I'm not as good at my job now compared to prechildren. And you know what? I don't care. It's a job. I like my job. But if I wasn't being paid I wouldn't be there. I am simply doing what's required of me till home time.
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02-07-2014 18:00 #11
02-07-2014 18:01 #12
It's a long article so I didn't read it all but must admit I can identify with her. I work 3 days and have to leave on time to pick up the kids from day care. Dh does morning drop off.
Anyway it's hard juggling work commitment and home. Previously I could stay back to meet deadlines but not anymore. Not being at work Thursday Friday means it takes me a bit longer to get my brain into gear on Monday.
Just my experience though as I am sure it's different for others.
02-07-2014 18:04 #13
I had many comments after I returned to work from having the twins- that not only was I more focused and driven, but that I was refreshed and had a new level of competence. Those comments came from at least 4 different areas.
I felt better about my chosen career, I was working smarter than ever before and I still left at 4 every afternoon bar meeting days to spend time with the boys.
Admittedly having dd threw a spanner in the works- I don't see me going back in any capacity outside of casual emergency until she is of school age due to child care- but df's work circumstances could change and I may need to re-enter the workforce stat.
I would like to think I would get even more of those comments this time but I doubt it.
Maybe (for me) being successful in my career is related to the number of small children I have, hence why I need to wait?
Not sure. Either way, I know the author has discovered she is shiz at juggling career and kids and wants to drag every mum down with her. Sorry, I'm not on that ship.
02-07-2014 18:54 #14
I have a slight amount of sympathy for the writer of the article. She might strike a chord with some industries and careers but she certainly doesn't speak for all. There are many careers where being a mum is an advantage. Many bosses and agencies/organisations that are flexible... Many careers where you can drop back to part time until your kids are school age etc.
Although I'm just at the start of my 12mths leave, DH and I are already throwing around the idea of me returning full time for a while and him taking some extended leave in a years time. We are both at a similar place in our professions however there is some things that I am keen to attain, which I could easily do and still be able to drop back to part time afterwards till our kids are school age and not have any adverse consequences.
It is great being an 'older ' new mum with recognised workplace seniority as the necessary advocacy, changes and flexibility to support the younger and newer colleagues embarking on parenthood journey can and does happen. It is possible to have a career and little kids, I would lose my marbles if I was a long term SAHM (and I take my hat off to the women who do it).
02-07-2014 19:11 #15
I admit, I struggle at work. I am the only person with a school/ pre school aged child in my office and whilst everyone else is staying back to put extra work in, I'm rushing off to pick up DS before day care shuts at 6pm. I personally feel that this has affected advancement in my career.
03-07-2014 06:17 #16
But does the author really believe that because that's her experience, that's true for all working mums? We should just all accept our limitations and leave it to the childless women (and of course the men when those women start having kids)?
Write about your experiences by all means but leave out the sweeping statements.
03-07-2014 07:12 #17Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
There is no 1 fit scenario for every woman out there. Each woman has her own obstacles and strengths, and this is going to appear in her performance at work.
I won't accept that just because I am a Mother that I am now somehow incompetent in fulfilling my role as an employee.
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03-07-2014 07:26 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2013
I too like some of you find this article offensive.
Women like this author really need to be more aware of what they are writing. It is a gross misrepresentation of ALL women and does no favours for fighting for equality in the workplace...which we still don't have across the board.
It also infuriates me when these sexist, one sided arguments are made about women's competence and there is zero mention about the fathers parenting duties or competence in the workplace. Last time I checked it took two people to make a baby, and while some women do have to raise kids on their own, the majority of fathers are involved in their kids lives. Where is the call for equal parenting? Where is the demand for fathers to step up and take more responsibility? Why aren't men judged on their parenting status in the workplace?
That's right because it's 2014 and women are still treated like baby making machines who are mothers to a kid before they are identified as anything else.
Last edited by hangingupsidedown; 03-07-2014 at 07:29.
03-07-2014 08:28 #19Junior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2014
Like a few have mentioned already, depends on circumstances at home.
I think this person isn't in a balanced state of mind to write on the topic. And this article is a self prophecy of her personal problem. Is the editor in chief a working mother as well to have let this crap get published in the age?
I'm not offended...this person is gonna look back and probably vomit.
09-07-2014 22:18 #20
This article is appalling. Did you see that it's in the 'Small Business' section of The Age? Great, just what we need, more business owners wary of hiring mums with young kids who can't work 50 hour weeks.
Totally resent her implication that all mothers' work is sub-par after they have kids. True, some days we may be more tired or have to miss out on interstate conferences and training courses. However, since having kids I have gone part time yet my workload hasn't reduced. I still get the same amount of work done in fewer hours which means I've improved my efficiency and also demonstrates more dedication and commitment than some of my colleagues who know they have a full day to get something done, whereas I have to get it done by 2.30pm so I can do school pickup.
I do agree with the article's take on working dads. There are more dads in my office now who share the school pickup, take a day off to look after sick kids etc, but in most families it's still mum who does all these things plus remember to pack school lunches, return permission slips, check homework, find school library books etc.
My personal experience is that I can't devote the same time my career progression as I did before DD, but I've made my peace with it. There will be plenty of time to progress my career later on, when she's older and I have more time on my hands. I believe that as long as I keep up to date with developments in my field, I am doing ok. I just tell myself that when DD's older and left home, I won't be looking back and thinking 'Gee I wish I'd put in more time at work.' I'll be thinking 'I'm glad I was able to be there for her and I did the best I could.'
Has anyone read that Sheryl Sandberg book 'Lean In' that is mentioned in the article? My former (childless) boss quoted bits of it to me and recommended that I read it, I've avoided it so far because some of the advice she quoted to me sounded like cr.p but would appreciate an actual working mum's opinion!
Also I can totally recommend the books 'Secret Diary of a Slummy Mummy' and 'I Don't Know How She Does It'. They're fiction books but so realistic about what it's like to be a working mum, they're hilarious and tear-jerking by turns! I think the 'Don't Know' book was made into a movie but haven't watched it.
Last edited by aquarius; 09-07-2014 at 22:21.
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