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  1. #1
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    Default When did you seek professional help for this issue??

    DS is nearly 5, he was fairly easy to toilet train initially but would have accidents when in a new/exciting environment. We always thought it was just him getting distracted / being too lazy to bother going to the toilet but the problem has got worse rather than better and he starts school next year. We have a few weeks with no accidents / just minor wee/ soiling... then we have another few weeks of frequent wee/poos. I get him to sit on the toilet every morning and after his bath and this does help but last few days it's not been enough he is doing large poo's in his underpants before he's taken to the loo or middle of the day (he is in preschool 4 days a week so hard to set times during those hours).
    My partner just thinks he is being lazy and can't be bothered to go, I used to feel like that and got quite angry with him but that never helped it just made him try and hide his accidents. Now I feel it is something medical and probably encopresis as I'm sure most of the time he does not know he has gone. I don't know if he doesn't feel it when it's happened or is embarrassed? DP just thinks he pretends he doesn't feel it. I don't agree. Sometimes when he sits to do one he will cry out that it hurts or tell me he couldn't get any out, but when I go to check he has done one. That strikes me as being more of something he is unaware of.
    Sorry for long ramble. I'm going to take him to our GP but from reading the other thread on here I wonder how much help that will be?? We have a newborn at home now and changing her nappies 10 times a day is much easier than dealing with DS's accidents!!

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    Subbing. My little boy is 4 and sounds very similar.

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    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
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    I would think a specialist might be necessary. four years old is usually old enough to be not soiling pants, the odd spill from the bladder yes, but I would think this is not a normal state for the age. GP and then a specialist. Marie

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    Quote Originally Posted by amyd View Post
    Subbing. My little boy is 4 and sounds very similar.
    Have you seen anyone? I'm battling to get dp to recognize this as a problem - he's doing the man thing that his kid is fine has no problem etc this will magically go away with time!

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    Quote Originally Posted by SuperGranny View Post
    I would think a specialist might be necessary. four years old is usually old enough to be not soiling pants, the odd spill from the bladder yes, but I would think this is not a normal state for the age. GP and then a specialist. Marie
    Have you any idea about what kind of specialist?

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    I agree with SuperGranny. Wetting the bed is fairly normal - soiling pants might indicate an issue (it might not too ... I dont truly know ... that is just instinct)

    I would go first up to your GP, and they will recommend someone else if necessary


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    It sounds like your ds might be constipated and what you're seeing is the overflow. If it's gone on long enough the nerves that say when to go may be damaged so he doesn't know he has soiled.

    My ds has never had soiling but does have chronic constipation. Soiling is usually a common factor though.

    We've been seeing doctors since he was around 2, after 12 months + of their "treatment" ie medicate him and he will grow out of it. I had enough as nothing was improving so insisted on seeing a pead. He specialises in behaviour and we've seen him around 2-3 years now. Best decision ever, in 2 weeks he had him willingly sitting on the toilet to go, something I never thought I'd see. Ds is 6. He is almost unmedicated, this is the closest to normal we've been in years.

    You could also see a continence nurse, they often work from community health centres, they can give you strategies also. Ours was useless but I've heard of others who have had great success with them.

    Good luck.

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    I have been seeing my gp about my 5 yr old ds for the past 9 months or so about this. He has had several X-rays which have confirmed that he is constipated and has been on parachoc for months. We have times when he doesn't soil but right now it's really bad, and I'm taking him back to the doctor again this weekend.

    I would definitely suggest seeing your gp as a first step.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Freyamum View Post
    Have you seen anyone? I'm battling to get dp to recognize this as a problem - he's doing the man thing that his kid is fine has no problem etc this will magically go away with time!
    I haven't seen anyone but starting the think I should. I'm stalling because I know that he can do it, it just seems to be childcare where he poos himself. I'm on mat leave soon so I might wait and see how things go then and if they don't improve I'll go to the dr.

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    Update on us. Dr was no help except to make sure ds knew that he needed to sit on toilet. But we are seeing big improvements. 10-20mins after breakfast and dinner the timer goes on for 10mins and he sits on toilet. He is told he doesn't need to strain just see if a poo comes. Increased fruit and veg and whole meal breads a bit and watching the junk - tho he ate pretty well before. As our issue was combination of laziness/toilet phobia I'm drumming it in that having an accident takes longer to clean up and therefore longer away from his game than going in the toilet. This is helping I think. He does poo morning and nightly now mostly with only 1 accident in maybe 3weeks. He is also starting to get signals so gets mega praise when does a spontaneous poo in the toilet. For me the biggest thing has to be consistency with that morning and night poo which is hard with other kids and in my case a baby but it seems to be working. Could all change tomorrow though! I found great article on this will post when not on mobile


 

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