I don't have a favourite but I do have one who can be more difficult than the others, and I can see how at times she has been the least favourite.
I love all my kids equally but to be honest there are times I don't like them equally. But it passes.
I've known heaps of people who grew up in families where there was a known favourite, perceived or in reality. I know my brothers, because of a variety of mental health problems required more help from my parents than either my sister or I have needed and it seemed at times like they were the favourites, but now I am a lot older I understand my parents were only trying to help those who needed it most at the time.
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22-06-2014 22:24 #11
22-06-2014 22:25 #12
I definitely don't have a favourite - but ds is 5 and dd only 3 months so they are at very different stages. Dh jokes all the time that dd is his favourite as she is the first perfect person to have ever lived.. It really bugs me as I would absolutely hate ds to ever hear it. Even if it is a joke.
22-06-2014 22:36 #13
22-06-2014 22:39 #14
It's certainly complicated. I just don't want her siblings to resent her the way my sister and I resented our brothers.
22-06-2014 22:57 #15
22-06-2014 23:04 #16
I don't know it's hard. At least as they get older hopefully they see how the others struggle and understand?
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22-06-2014 23:15 #17
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23-06-2014 03:21 #18
I love my 3 children equally, to even consider that I could favour one over the other makes me feel ill. I love that they are all completely different. I'm sure as they grow I could get along with one better then another doesn't mean that one would be my favourite though.
23-06-2014 06:16 #19
My two boys are very young (almost 3 and almost 1) and so far I don't have a favourite. I'm pregnant with our third who is a girl and others have already dropped hints about her being the most special purely based on the fact that she is a she so that makes me a bit sad. Each of them has a completely different personality so I guess on some days I find myself "liking" one a little more than the other
Growing up I was the favourite child to my dad and to be honest as an adult it makes me sad when I think back to how differently my sister was treated I was allowed to do things she wasn't...little things like grab a drink by myself whereas she was always made to ask. He would call her terrible names and she would always be in trouble yet I got away with everything. My mum tried so hard to equalise us and pick up the slack he was making. I think she still feels guilty that she didn't leave him sooner but that's not something my sister or I even think about because we always felt like equals by her.
I don't think there's anything wrong with having a favourite, sometimes It's just human nature!
Eta: I didn't mean to make it sound like a bad thing that there may be a favourite. Just that in my sister's case my dad made her know I was the favourite with his negative behaviour and bully attitude towards her.
Last edited by Purple Lily; 23-06-2014 at 06:23.
23-06-2014 06:19 #20
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