It's a stupid comment.
I would love to ask her "sorry, but what do you mean by that?". Unfortunately we can only speculate on it!
It was either a brain fart spontaneous comment with no thought behind it, or she genuinely thinks only child families aren't 'proper'.
I have an only child, I dare someone to tell me I don't have a proper family
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20-06-2014 08:33 #31
20-06-2014 08:36 #32Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2008
It's rude, presumptuous and offensive.
I'm sorry she said it, OP. You're already a 'proper' family.
20-06-2014 08:54 #33
People are really strange. My DH briefly ran into an old friend about a month ago and this guy congratulated him because we'd "finally gotten around to having a baby". Like our lives were incomplete without one, when in fact DH and I were perfectly happy as we were and bubba came along as a surprise package.
It made me so angry though because it did make me feel like our life choice - not to have any children of our own (DH has a son already) - was not socially acceptable. But for all this guy knew we could have been trying for the five years of our marriage and it just hadn't happened. Imagine how someone who had gone through lots of fertility treatments would feel hearing that!
I really think people should try to keep there comments simple. Whatever happened to just saying "congratulations" without adding any of their own issues/preconceptions/etc to it?!
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20-06-2014 09:22 #34
Def odd, I wonder what she meant.
I have an only child- we most def are not a "proper" family! We are a super awesome fantastic family!!!
Last edited by SimplyMum; 20-06-2014 at 09:25.
20-06-2014 09:42 #35
20-06-2014 09:49 #36Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
We have 2 girls and always get comments like "so you're probably going to try again for a boy soon huh" or "your DH must be disappointed he doesn't have a son". So rude
20-06-2014 12:06 #37
I think it's obvious what she meant.
It was a stupid thing to say. Insensitive, rude, patronising and misguided. Proper families come in all shapes and sizes.
20-06-2014 12:45 #38
It was a strange thing to say.
I also hate when people ask if we are going to try for a boy after 2 girls. No. I'm not intending on any more. Yes I'm sure dp is a tad disappointed he didn't get a boy. Yes we are still happy with what we got though. We may well end up with a boy in dd2 yet lol! She is only 2 and always saying she is a boy.
I also hate how some people say they are glad they don't have girls because they(girls in general) are just b****'s. Yeah and your(particular person I know) boy isn't the biggest one of all!?
20-06-2014 12:57 #39
20-06-2014 13:12 #40
I don't think it's a big deal because she didn't mean any malice . People just make conversation and I think we have become far too sensitive . I get asked all the time when number two is coming along. I could be offended that my son isn't good enough but people are just making conversation and showing interest. There are worse things people could say .
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