This would never occur to me to be an issue! First because I don't get why a name needs to be carried on - it seems a very old-fashioned, class thing ("Why yes, I am from the prestigious Money-Sterling family, we own much land!").
And second, because if people do want to carry on a name, then there's no reason that women should have to change their names to their husband's, or that children should automatically be given their father's surname.
I don't think such deeply patriarchal traditions should really have a place in our supposedly equal society... (Of course if one wants to change their name or give the children their dad's name then that's all cool - but it shouldn't be the rule, you know?)
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13-06-2014 20:29 #21
13-06-2014 20:40 #22Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2014
I don't really get it either.
I also don't think having a son guarantees that the name will be passed down these days as some men don't end up having children.
Some do have kids, but the kids are given the mother's surname, and I've actually heard of a few men changing their name to their wife's (or both choosing something completely different).
I kept my surname and DH and I gave our 3 kids my surname.
My brother doesn't want to have children, so out of 1 boy & 1 girl I've been the one to carry on the name in our case (not that I've ever given it any thought until now!).
I also won't be surprised (or disappointed) if my kids change their names when they marry and the name isn't carried on any further.
Last edited by sky1; 13-06-2014 at 21:30.
13-06-2014 21:25 #23
I've never given it much thought. Perhaps because I don't like having my dad's name or maybe because it's very common.
Funny enough though DH was talking about this topic just today. He was telling me about ribbing his brother and 1st cousin that the pressure was off them to pass on the name now we've had a boy. He'd gone through all his cousins, 2nd cousins etc in his head already and worked out that it was up to the 3 of them to carry on the name. So it must be important to him on some level.
13-06-2014 21:49 #24
13-06-2014 21:56 #25
I think it is sad that people care about carrying on a name instead of a healthy happy baby.
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13-06-2014 22:01 #26Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
This has crossed my mind before but doesn't really bother me. My maiden name is finished; my kids have ex's name, and all the males in my family are defective LOL.. my brothers will never meet anyone let alone reproduce, my aunties have families but with married names, my uncles are incredibly defective and thus eternally single as well.
I guess it's crossed my mind as like an honouring my dad thing, as he passed away when I was young. But it's just a name really, and I don't have a way of passing on the name anyway now, so..... *shrug*
13-06-2014 22:03 #27
My family had one boy in my generation, so luckily he had one son or my family name would have ended there.
I have one DS which keeps hubby's name, he was the only boy in his generation so I'm thankful we had a son!
13-06-2014 22:07 #28
My sister took her hubby's name and my DS has DP's surname, but we have loads of cousins and a fairly common name so it doesn't really bother me.
Perhaps if I had a more unique surname or were particularly connected to my cultural heritage I might feel differently.
13-06-2014 22:20 #29Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2011
13-06-2014 22:46 #30
My dad has 2 daughters so our family name isn't being carried on. My bump will have their dad's name.
Having said that, my dad's last name wasn't the one he started with. Hated his own dad so changed his name to his uncles.
Names are curious things.
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