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13-06-2014 13:35 #51Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2005
13-06-2014 14:44 #52
Were you ' looking ' for a partner when you met or not looking at all.
I had only just given up looking. I had divorced my ex-husband a year before and had been desperately looking for someone since then. Decided to stop actively looking and just go out and have a nice time. Met him within weeks of changing to that attitude!
How long after you met did you realize this was the one?
Well, <blush> the night we met I definitely thought it would just be a bit of fun, he is 9 years younger than me, so we went home together and I thought nothing more would come of it! I was most definitely in lust He works away and it took us 9 months of "hooking up" (for want of a better term!) most days, every time he was home, to finally decide we couldn't deny it any longer, we were in love!
I think I realised that a little while before that, and before him, though....but I'm not sure whether at that point I knew he was "the one" or whether I was just determined to get him I knew I felt differently about him than anyone I'd ever met though. It was like no matter what happened, I knew we'd end up together.
To answer the question - I think it was probably a year after we first met that I really realised that he was definitely the one for me. I needed to see who he was in lots of different situations (especially the times when things went wrong, or when I got upset, or when life wasn't rosy) to be sure I was truly in love with him as a person, and not just infatuated.
I don't believe in love at first sight, I'm well aware of how the infatuation period works. That period usually lasts between 6 to 18 months for most people - at the end of that time is when you find out whether your relationship has grown into actual love, or not. Unfortunately, that doesn't always mean people end the relationship at that point if it didn't turn into love - the infatuation period between my ex husband and I ended after about a year - then we stayed together for another 13 years.
Last edited by HillDweller; 13-06-2014 at 14:48.
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