I completely get were you are coming from op and I would feel the same way too, but maybe your step daughter in-law felt she was just being a big sister iykwim. I would say something along the lines to her like I heard dd asked about your tampons I wish she had come to me first.
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10-06-2014 17:41 #11
10-06-2014 17:50 #12-
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I would be quite cranky. How old is the SIL? Perhaps she is just oblivious as to the fact that it's something many mothers would like to chat with their daughters about.
10-06-2014 17:59 #13
I would be annoyed and probably upset if it came from someone I dislike.You seem to have ill feeling for that lady so you are probably reacting stronger IYKWIM.
Pre children though I know I would have done the same than your husbands sons wife tbh. I would not even have considered it might not be ok with the mum.
Last edited by ExcuseMyFrench; 10-06-2014 at 19:37.
10-06-2014 18:02 #14
Considering it was a question asked, the SIL told the truth - and you said yourself that you don't mind your DD knowing about the periods themselves, but that you were not the one to talk about it.
I would probably go back to the SIL and let her know that at the time, you hadn't broached the subject with your DD yet, and while you appreciate her responding in honesty, next time sensitive topics (insert your topics here! Lol) should be referred back.
I don't agree with a PP who said that it has taken away an opportunity for open and honest discussion because it doesn't seem like the SIL was anything other than responding to a question asked (unless you suspect malice reasons).
She probably didn't think anything of it, so it would be worth mentioning to her so it doesn't happen again.
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10-06-2014 20:49 #15
I really don't think the woman did anything wrong. She responded honestly to a question asked of her.
You still have ample opportunity to give your daughter as much info as you want to about periods or whatever, perhaps it is time to start giving her information about other topics YOU would like to personally discuss with her, as she sounds to be an open and curious girl, the next thing will probably be her coming home with a 'strange' version of the birds and the bees from school.
My sons know pretty much everything there is to know about periods, they have seen me in the toilet changing pads, so I have told them everything really, so possibly they will be 'educating' people at school themselves about it!
11-06-2014 08:52 #16
I don't think she did anything wrong.
I am presuming that since your child was sleeping over there that she has a good relationship with her step sister in law? She probably just answered a simple question with a simple answer.
I personally would be a little embarrassed that my child didn't already know what periods were. At least she got factual information and not something silly from the school yard.
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River Song (11-06-2014)
11-06-2014 08:58 #17
I would be pretty upset by this. I wouldn't be mad at the step-DIL, she probably just felt it was the big sisterly thing to do. However I would chat to her so she knows to direct any further questions on reproduction to you.
As a teacher, if I told a 7 year old student about periods just because they saw a tampon and asked what it was, I would get dragged over hot coals.
11-06-2014 09:22 #18
11-06-2014 09:30 #19
For my DD this would be too young, this is exactly the sort of thing that causes her anxiety, so she would be already stressing about something that isn't going to happen for at least another 2-3 years.
The curriculum covers this in year 6, so around 11 years old. I appreciate that this is too late for some girls (my periods started at 10) however I would not take it upon myself to discuss this with a student before then (with a few exceptions - early puberty, no mother etc - and then I would probably still check with my principal first).
11-06-2014 09:46 #20
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