I am just not comfortable using the naughty corner with 2 year old DS. He's too young for it probably, and plus since i have been doing it a little lately i feel its made him play up more.
My mother was on to me constantly that I should be using it with him as it gives us 'both time out'
SO after watching some Supernanny's I decided to give it a shot.
Then yesterday when she came over, I was in the middle of doing the naughty corner with him after he grabbed a glass off the table, refused to give it back and threw it against the wall - smashing it everywhere. My mother walks in and picks him up and hugs him, telling him "it's alright darling grandma is here now" After she was done comforting him, she put him down and told me I can finish now Grandma made him feel better.
To me that has ruined it for me now as now he will see me as a big bully when i do it so i want to wipe the whole thing and do something else when he has been especially naughty. I am feeling stressed and couldn't sleep last night thinking about it (pregnancy hormones probably playing a part there)
What do you do for your 2 year old's when they have played up if you don't use the naughty corner?
I am also contemplating telling my other how p!ssed off I am about her interference and how it's ruined the whole concept for me now. GRRR!! But i wont make this thread about her. I should have spoken up at the time, it really only seemed to sink in what happened after it was done with.
Anyways any tips would be great.
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02-06-2014 09:50 #1
Alternatives to 'naughty corner'
Last edited by Serenity Love; 02-06-2014 at 09:55. Reason: added more.
02-06-2014 10:08 #2
Around Easter time my DS was insanely naughty and nothing was working until I finally had enough and started taking away all his toys (and I mean ALL). It took a few days but then he suddenly realized that when he was good he got something back and if he was naughty I took it away again. He has been so much better lately. No "calm down time" (my term for the naughty chair) for weeks.
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02-06-2014 10:13 #3
Time out never worked for my dd. But taking away toys or turning tv off is what works for her and she isnt allowed anything back until she behaves. And always make sure ypu follow through when you say something to them.
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02-06-2014 10:16 #4
Thanks ladies, they sound like good ideas.
02-06-2014 10:22 #5
I would have been furious!!! After it was her who told you to use that technique for her to be the one sabotaging it!!! Anyhoo... Back to the question...
I found any form of time out pretty useless before about 3. Ditto for sticker charts.
I did however use positive reinforcement which essentially boils down to being vigilant to notice when they do the right thing and praise it. On the flip side, it's important to not make a big fuss when they do the wrong thing. Yes, tell them off sternly with your grumpy face on but that's it. No fighting, no escalating into tantrums from them and tears from you.
So with the glass situation. Child picks up glass. Parent says "no, glass/can break (firm voice). Let's put it back gently (happy encouraging voice)." If they put it back then lots of "yay, well done". If not then take a deep breath and don't let yourself start getting mad, even say something like "put it back" then turn away. Again watch out of the corner of your eye and lots if praise if they put it back. If not and they then smash it you will need to remove the child from danger but don't start a screaming match, just take them off to their cot/room, clean up, bring them out again. Talk to them with grumpy face on in low tones about the danger of what they did and what makes mummy happy (not touching glass things).
I was a bit "yeah right" when I read about this method. I was studying behaviour management as part of my teaching degree (and wrangling a 2yo!) and it was one of the techniques suggested. At that point I'd tried time out, naughty mat, yelling, crying, pleading and even smacked her bottom once - nothing was working so I figured I had nothing to lose. It does take work though as remembering to notice good behaviours is not instinctive. Good luck!
02-06-2014 10:22 #6Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2008
I found removing myself worked well. I'd tell DD I was going to go and do X (usually cleaning or something boring) until she calmed down. Then I'd walk away and get into the task and not engage. I found that took a lot of the 'fun' out of playing up.
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02-06-2014 10:27 #7
We do the cool - down corner with our 18 month old and I works amazingly for us.
He won't come out until the person who put him in there says he can! We try to use it as a place to cool off. When he comes out (1 minute) the person who put him there tells him why he went in and gives him a kiss and a cuddle and he's happy as Larry after!
Fx that keeps working for us, but it won't work for everyone.
I hope you find something that works.
These kids are hard!
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02-06-2014 10:44 #8
Wow .. I have already been using the suggestions in here and WOW! BIG improvement. I am feeling annoyed for listening to my bldy mother in the first place. I did try to tell her time out isn't for everyone, but she seemed to get in my head that it was. UGH. Thanks all.. really appreciate it.
02-06-2014 10:46 #9
02-06-2014 10:51 #10
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