We get out a lot. Even if it's just doing the shopping or taking myself out for a coffee. We have mothers group weekly plus group fitness training with mums and bubs twice a week. Then I have school runs, house work, the occasional catchup with a friend or relative as well as I pop in and have lunch or coffee with DF whenever I can and I haves few hobbies I come back to when I get a chance. So I think if I didn't deliberately fill my weeks I would get much more lonely.
I think somedays I feel it more but I have noticed it's worse when I feel a bit taken for granted or if DF and I have had a bad patch in our relationship. I'm not as happy in general so it highlights how isolating being a SAHM can be.
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02-05-2014 19:48 #81
02-05-2014 19:52 #82
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Last edited by peanutmonkey; 02-05-2014 at 20:30.
02-05-2014 19:59 #83
No, bored sometimes with no adult conversation, but lonely, no, DS is with me all day!
02-05-2014 19:59 #84
I've been a SAHM at intervals and never, ever felt lonely. I actually do spend a lot of time alone (or with DS) but I like that, and I'm always busy and the days fly by. I just don't ever get lonely. In fact, being around people too often annoys me. Strange I suppose.
02-05-2014 20:06 #85Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2005
When I was a SAHM I was a bit lonely. I lived with mum for the first 18 monthes of ds life as I was a single mum. She was a wonderful nan to ds but spent a lot of time in her room as she suffered from depression. I basically had no friends as the ones I had prior to ds were childless and we couldn't really relate to each other anymore. My mothers group was full of fairy snobby woman who weren't really interested in me being poor and single. I did connect with one lovely mum though and we are friends to this day. I started work when ds was a year old . I took him to swimming lessons and gymbaroo and tried to keep busy. Could I ever be a full time SAHM mum again though? Probably not. It works for some people though.
02-05-2014 20:19 #86
I'm more lonely as a mum working full time than what I was as a sahm. I'm out the door at 7 am every morning, home at 5 where I cook dinner, feed, bath, play/read with and bed DS. Finally get to sit down at 730 to have some dinner. By time I cleanup and prepare everything for the next day it's 10pm. Come the weekend I have housework, groceries and some family time. My life is busy, I don't have time for seeing anyone during the week, weekend just fly by. Suddenly friends are few and far between, but I can understand why, they never see me.
I have adult company at work but it's 95% business. My job is fairly high pressured, if I stop for breaks I don't get stuff done, there's not much socialising.
My husband works late so by time he gets home, I'm ready for bed.
Sorry OP, it's not really answering your question! I think this mothering gig can be lonely in both circumstances.
02-05-2014 20:20 #87
02-05-2014 20:23 #88
Do you get lonely being a SAHM?
02-05-2014 20:26 #89
02-05-2014 20:28 #90
Yep. Definitely. I think in a different time/ culture/ societies, mums would be constantly surrounded by people.
I often wish my 'tribe' were around when the little one is wanting to be held and I just need to have a wee/ mop the floor/ hide and eat chocolate.
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