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  1. #1
    Buttoneska's Avatar
    Buttoneska is offline Winner 2010- Most Community Minded Thread Award
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    Default Did you have a point where...

    ...you absolutely knew you were done with kids. No more. Not ever. If so when was it and how did you feel

    We are done at two and dh had the snip a month or so ago. THere has been a cross over period where although unlikely it's possible we could have got pregnant with number three. While I didn't really want number three something in my DNA make it tempting and it kinda played on my mind.

    Well now it's final. We are done. DH has got rid if enough loads post surgiries to have no swimmers I.and I have just got af.

    I feel such a mysterious weight off my shoulders. No more what's ifs or pondering. No more holding onto baby things just in case. I feel so free and excited about the future

  2. #2
    Eco Goddess's Avatar
    Eco Goddess is offline Loving life under the Bodhi tree!
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    Yep... Last week when I found out I was starting early menopause at 29!

    We were almost certain we were done but couldn't commit to a vasectomy. Now we know it's over and although I was a little sad at first that the option was gone I now think it's just meant to be and feel that weight off your shoulders that you described. I have started selling off all our baby stuff as DD outgrows it

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    We have been done since our daughter I have always said 2 we joked about a 3rd but I know we both only want 2 even asked for a tubal ligation but was told no as I was early 20s....
    Don't want husband to get snip unless he wants to just in case but I know I'm done.

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    OP - still use precautions (I'm sure your doctor who performed the vasectomy would of advised) especially if you do not want a third.

    My husband took 12mths to lose all him swimmers.

    I knew we were done when I had my 6wk check up & got strongly advised to not have anymore due to the issues I'd had in my pregnancy.

  5. #5
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    MilkingMaid is offline Winner 2009 - Mod Award - most supportive member
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    Yes, the boys father and I decided we were happy with 2 kids only, then days later I found out I was pregnant Had bub no 3, and that was a definite 'we are finished!!'

    As I'm a solo Mum, I think it's decided, even if I met some scrumptious bloke, I never want to go through the baby stage again, I think PND 3 times is more than enough!

    I can relate to your feeling of lightness, I have that a bit now all three of mine are at school, I can relax a little, and make a few plans for MYSELF!!

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    Buttoneska's Avatar
    Buttoneska is offline Winner 2010- Most Community Minded Thread Award
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    Oh yeh he going for tests this week

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    Definitely done at 4 kids. Dp had the snip and I too feel that lightness. With four.kids, time and opportunity for s.ex is limited so now we are safe to do it when we want to without the fear of pregnancy. I am very happy to know that I am done, there is no chance of any more babies, and I don't have to mess around with condoms or other birth control, my body no longer needs to.be.messed with. Now when dd4 weans, my body will truly be my own again.

    Sent from my C6603 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Im almost due with number 4 and for the first time in my life can honestly say im done. Dh feels the same and has decided to get the snip.

    We spoke about it when I was pregnant with our third, and when he said he wanted the snip back then there was a feeling of sadness and I realised I wasnt done. Thankfully he felt the same and so didnt have it done. Neither of us felt quite complete yet.

    But now its different. When we talk about him having it, the only feeling is relief. And impatience- hurry up and have it done already lol.

    me + he = dd1 (July 2007), dd2 (July 2010), dd3 (August 2012), dd4 (due May 2014) + sil (1997)

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    Congratulations on getting to this point!
    It's great to hear that a lot of you feel light and free knowing you're done. I'm finally expecting my first and am glad to know there'll come a time where my mind and life isn't completely consumed by babies and pregnancy!

    Buttoneska - I remember when you were TTC and you posting a thread about finally feeling ok with the thought of never having children. Then getting your BFP about 2 weeks later! It's kind of cool to see this part of your story have a happy ending and closure, if that makes sense?
    I hope that doesn't come across as weird and stalkery - I've just been on BH for ages and there's heaps of members/threads/events that I still remember years later!

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    No. I had really hoped I would feel done afer my 3rd bub. I really wanted to feel done, but I'm not even close. I can not imagine not having another. Problem is our house is way too small for a 4th child, so a 4th would turn our world upside down with having to move or at least renovate..
    Dont want to have to do any of that, and know we would financially be better off stopping now, but SO not done.


 

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