As the title suggests, tonight is a 'sad' night. 7 months on and I am still wondering what on earth I did to deserve the hand I have been dealt. Why was my life was turned upside down?! I am also having a difficult time with my new label as 'single mother' and when people ask what my husband does and I reply "it's just me" I am felt sorry for?! Where did my loving husband of nine years go? Its so hard to see Daddy's with their babies and families enjoying the most precious time in their lives. Probably wouldn't be as difficult if he was the only person that walked out on me in the last few years. I don't often have a meltdown so writing it down here makes me feel so much better and I'm just exhausted from having to be Mummy and Daddy. This wasn't how it was supposed to be!
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01-04-2014 21:12 #1
Feeling sad & sorry for myself tonight...
01-04-2014 21:17 #2
Oh hun, you did nothing wrong, and certainly didn't deserve the way that man treated you. Dealing with rejection is a very difficult task, and probably more so when you are busy being all things to your little girl. It's a rough hand you've been dealt, and it's ok to feel down. Does it help to realise these down days are getting less frequent?
I have these days too. I have down weeks! All I know how to do is just breathe, put one foot in front of the other and keep going. You are so strong, but please reach out for someone to talk to if you need. And we're here too x
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02-04-2014 06:46 #3
Yep- sometimes it feels good to just go "Why me?" and sometimes even the "I should have stayed with "him", at least then I wouldn't have financial issues or at least I could have extended my family like I so desperately want. Then I pull myself out of the rutt by reminding myself that living with "him", like "that" was not a way to spend a life, was not a way for my DS to grow up and that no amount of financial stability in the world is worth my happiness. I then remind myself of how lucky I am to have what I have, and how far I have come- all the things I have achieved. Eventually I come out of it.
Hope you feel better soon- sometimes a big pity party is all that you need, so harp on- yell and scream and rant away about how unfair and crap it is. Chances are- we're feeling it as well.
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02-04-2014 08:23 #4
It's perfectly normal to have days like that sometimes OP.
Trust me, the grass is not always greener on the other side.
It takes a while (a year or two for many) to get over the pain of a long-term relationship break-up. But I guarantee you, you will come out the other side a happier, stronger person. Many people stay in less than perfect relationships for far too long - what's two years of break-up pain compared to 10-15 years of resentment or unhappiness in the wrong relationship?
The ones that get out of those imperfect relationships are the lucky ones, just remember that even though it doesn't feel like it now.
Sometimes when I see my ex I notice his good qualities and miss that or wonder what if. But then I remember how I was not thriving in that relationship at all, and I have come a long way since then! I know in better off!
02-04-2014 17:05 #5
I don't have a lot of spare energy today to think of some inspiring words but I did want to send you hugs.
02-04-2014 19:09 #6
Thanks everyone! Feeling much better today and am back to myself. Just needed your kind words to get me through. Hugs to you all! xx
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02-04-2014 21:55 #7
Glad to hear it. Hang in there x
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