I have a 26 month gap between DD and DS1 which had its pros and cons. Pros are that they are very close, DD was at the baby fascination stage when he was born so use to try and help or sit and do whatever I was doing with DS1 to one of her dolls. The cons were that DD was a very full on toddler and I feel I didn't get to spend any quality time with DS1 until she started prep. There is nearly a 6 year age gap between DS1 and DS2 and it has been fantastic I get to spend quality time with him, he idolises his siblings and loves playing with them and they with him, they each like spending there own time with him and they are happy to help when I need it.
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11-02-2014 11:39 #11
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11-02-2014 11:49 #12
We have 21 months between our two, and honestly, it's been absolutely wonderful. When I fell pregnant with DS2 I was freaking out, I had never planned to have such a small gap, so it's been a lovely surprise.
DS1 took to DS2 straight away, we've never had any issues with jealousy and he's been fairly gentle with him.
Yes, we have two in nappies but honestly that's not a problem, especially if you're using disposables. I'm actually happier that they are both in nappies, I don't need to worry about DS1 regressing if we'd started toilet training.
The hardest part of the day for me is between 4 and 7.30 - just juggling two small people through the dinner/bath/bed/witching hour. DH was home for the first five weeks so that was great, but after he went back to work I very quickly got us into a routine - DS2 is given a top up at 5 no matter what, so that I can focus on dinner and DS1 until he's bathed and ready for bed, without having to worry that DS2 is hungry. DS2 has reflux so for the first fortnight or so I either wore him or let him cry whilst I dealt with DS1 (and that *was* tough). Then I bought a swing and it was a lifesaver. So it's just a matter of figuring out what works for you.
It's busy but it's lovely - good luck with your IVF journey xxx
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11-02-2014 11:49 #13
11-02-2014 12:07 #14
I had a ridiculously close age gap of 13 months and it was hard the first couple of years just for logistical reasons but is now a blessing as they are close and play together a lot.
As for PND. I have had a few friends that suffered quite badly and went on to have more kids. It did happen again in a few of the cases but they had plans in place, support and skills that allowed them to be better equipped to deal with it. Good luck x
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11-02-2014 12:08 #15
We will have a 20 month gap and although we have basically TTC since DS was 6 months old I have had a freak out or two about if ill cope.
But tbh I think it'll be great. Right now I'm really really struggling with all day sickness and looking after a 1 year old, but then that's better than an older child who notices that mummy is lying on the floor not doing much except for spewing every half an hour or so! And he doesn't mind not going out and is just happy to have cuddles.
Plus he currently still has 2 day sleeps so I can rest and then by the time belly bub comes he should still be having 1 decent sleep.
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11-02-2014 12:13 #16
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11-02-2014 12:31 #17
My smallest age gap is 17 months and my biggest age gap will be this bub at about 2.5 years. I love having smaller age gaps, I love that I will have 4 children under 6 and in 2 years time will have four children over 20 and be able to do the things I want to do (i'll only be 48 by the time my youngest is 20)
Its tough at times, but I honestly thing my 17 months age gap was the easiest as it was more like having two babies. When it was all getting too much for me entertainment was them both in the pram and me walking for an hour then everyone felt better. The oldest wasnt toilet trained, so there was no regression. He slept well at night and still had a 3 hour day nap so in that time I could get a decent nap in and do a few things around the house (or sit on the couch cuddling newbie for three hours uninterupted which is what normally happened).
I think no matter what the age gap there are teething problems, and just when you have it all figured out one of them changes things on you. But watching them grow up together is amazing.
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11-02-2014 12:33 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2012
I will have a 4 year age gap!! Am a bit nervous about that but I'm sure it will have it's perks. DD1 is toilet trained and sleeping through, but it will be hard to go back to nappies and waking frequently through the night.
I too suffered from pretty bad PND with my first, I don't think I've ever been the same person since and stress really gets my anxiety going so I'm sure I'll get it again but this time not be scared or ashamed to ask for help. Will be interesting!!
11-02-2014 12:46 #19
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11-02-2014 13:22 #20
By Jamaica in forum What Gap between Babies?Replies: 26Last Post: 14-09-2013, 20:31
By cluckcluck in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & ChatReplies: 12Last Post: 10-06-2013, 14:10
By atomicmama in forum General ChatReplies: 45Last Post: 14-03-2013, 18:44
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