We didn't have rules as such, but I had asked family during the pregnancy to not visit at hospital, we were happy to have visitors at home but I just wanted DH and DD1 when DD2 was born.
In the end DD2 was early so I did need my mum a bit because she was buying things that we didn't have, like prem clothes. So that was fine! She also picked up when I needed to be left alone and would just up and leave. But one of my SILs was so out of line. She barged in unannounced with her two kids who screamed and carried on the whole time, jumped all over me (I'd just had an emergency CS) and then she had the balls to get angry when she couldn't see DD... Who was in NICU.
If we ever have another I will be like a PP and just not tell anyone when it's happening.
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03-02-2014 22:51 #11Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
03-02-2014 22:55 #12
No rules for us. Though I was really annoyed that my husbands Aunty and uncle showed up first thing the morning after she was born - our immediate families had barely seen her and hadn't held her. I didn't realised, I was so dazed from my pain medication that I had just assumed she'd been passed around while I was in recovery (I was later assured that she wasn't passed around, hubby was holding her and MIL held her while hubby came to recovery as the Dr wanted to talk to him). So next time I will make it clear that it is only to be our immediate families for visits while in hospital, and everyone else can come once we're home (the entry fee will be a freezable meal lol).
I didn't care about seeming rude to visitors while I was in hospital, I was so tired from pain meds and a non-sleeping baby at night that I just rolled over and went to sleep while they were there lol!
03-02-2014 22:59 #13
I intend not telling anyone that we have had baby until we are ready to have visitors
After baby arrives we will send some time as a family and I will prepare myself for visitors then we will call our family and let them know they can come and meet our new addition
Our family know this is our plan. It is VERY important to me that we have some time before the chaos begins
03-02-2014 23:05 #14
We prepped our friends and family that we planned to keep visitors to a minimum, then when the time came, everyone was really respectful and waited for our invitation to come up. We have gatherings a few weeks later for friends and extended family to meet bub.
No one was upset by this (as far as we were aware) and if anyone was, well, me recovering from my CS and us getting to know bub without extra stress were more important to us.
03-02-2014 23:45 #15Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2014
I developed pre eclampsia sometime between 40 weeks and 40+9 when I had my daughter so because of all the meds and drips I was on I was taken to ICU for the first day/night.
My mum and sisters, mil and fil came up to visit. It was only supposed to be 2 in at a time but they all showed up at the same time! The next two days I had mil and sil, grandparents, my dad and brothers and friends all come to visit. I didn't mind people coming but at one point I had 9 people in my room!! My blood pressure was sky high so the midwife was more than happy to kick them out lol!
Next time I'd definitley rather they call first to organise a time so I'm not so overwhelmed
04-02-2014 00:25 #16
We had planned only my mum, as she was my support in labour with df. then once we announced we would let others in.
df, much to my disgust called mil on the way to hospital at 2 am. Through contractions I told her to go back to sleep, trying to sound normal. I guess I sucked at it. an hour after arriving in our labour delivery room, who should barge in but mil and her partner. Not freaking happy!!
Well, I ended up with a hospital transfer, so I didn't have to worry about them too long. I only had mum and df the whole time so we were away from anyone and everyone!
As tired as I was I would have loved at least one *wanted* visitor to show ds off too. (I tollerated mil for dfs sake, but hated her really lol)
at home, people called first which was good. Mil had her nose out of joint that the hospital transferred me 5hrs away, and claims we were keeping ds away from her (like I planed that they wouldnt be able to cope with my high risk, and on a public holiday!)
When we finally concieve #2, we will let mum know, maybe a friend as they will care for ds... (mum may come in for delivery if I get a vbac?) Then it will be immediate family for day one, close friends and family in hospital, everyone else can wait. Im not fussed about upsetting them. Its our baby, and they will meet it once we have enjoyed our quality family time.
We cut mil off 2yrs ago so its a non issue now.
Proudly brought to you by me and my autocorrect fail device.
04-02-2014 00:38 #17
Once I got home I did.
Visitors could come mornings only and by appointment....
I wish I'd implemented it from the beginning..... Think it was about two weeks in I started it.
04-02-2014 02:52 #18
No visitors at hospital for DD1 and it will be the same with DD2.
People can come to my home when I'm ready.
04-02-2014 03:37 #19
None with ds1. With ds2 only dp and ds1 were allowed to visit for at least half a day first, then family could come after that. No rules for at home, no one came to visit me anyway. With dd I said no visitors for the first half of the day so ds1 and ds2 could get cuddles first. She was in special care so the In laws ended up coming in to see her quickly after the boys got a cuddle. It was only a quick cuddle though. At home I said no visitors into dd was 6wks (due to it being xmas time and germs and the fact she was dropping oxygen at birth . I didn't want her getting sick). She is 7wks now and had her first cold due to germy visitors
04-02-2014 05:35 #20
No no need for any rules for us. Close family were welcome any time. A few close friends also visited in hospital and they all texted first to check for a convenient time. I liked having visitors in the hospital, I was in for 5 days both times after sections, recovered well and enjoyed the company.
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