I'm due with bub #2 in September and I'm looking for tips on how to settle bub #2 with a 2.5 year old toddler.
I'm keen to teach bub to self settle before the dreaded 4 month sleep regression sets in. I suffered PND with DD 1 due to lack of sleep and 3-5 night wakings, so I really want to get this sleep business sorted.
I'm not keen on carrying bub for a multitude of reasons' and I want to avoid rocking/bouncing and feeding to sleep.
I obviously still need to give my toddler attention too so I can't spend all my time settling bub #2
Does anyone have any advice? I'm open to crying and non crying solutions, anything really.
Me 31, He 35, DD 22 months, Bub #2 due 22 September 2014.
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25-01-2014 21:52 #1
Tips for settling bub #2
28-01-2014 12:59 #2
28-01-2014 13:53 #3
I can give you my advice, well, what I did with our DS2.. but I understand that every baby is different, so just tailor it to whatever suits you!
I was in hospital for 3 days, and started swaddling for nap time and "trying" to adapt a pre-sleep routine (still feeding on demand) so he knew it was time for rest.
The day we brought him home, I fed, changed and wrapped him- then placed him in his room, in the bassinet- awake. And didn't hear a peep. Went back in about 10 mins later, he'd put himself to sleep! He still had love, cuddles and millions of kisses at awake time. But from day one he knew the sleep routine and was sleeping through the night (11pm-6am) from about 3 months old. Prior to that he was also having a 3am feed.
He was a very content, breastfed bubba- and is a happy, affectionate, almost 6 year old now. Having him self settle (which he rarely had to, as he was always happy to go to bed) from the get-go was the best thing we did! After a terrible time with DS1 and several trips to a sleep clinic- he was an absolute dream. We used the techniques that our sleep clinic nurse taught us.
Good luck- I hope you have as much luck as we did!
28-01-2014 13:57 #4
Our routine consisted of (as I said, this was just ours):
Feed, cuddle, kisses and chat,
Darkening the room/pram/or wherever we were. (With pram- place wrap over opening so bubs isn't stimulated),
Quick cuddle and sing a soft song or two,
Place in cot/bassinet/pram.
28-01-2014 14:52 #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2012
Hi, I struggled enormously with my 2nd bub when he was born dd was 21mths old. I was blessed she slept well and had a 3hr day sleep at the time. However it was still very hard and exhausting. Ds was a needy demanding bub who pretty much cried all the time and wouldn't settle it sleep without me. I put up with it for 4mths until it broke me. Once again pnd crept up.
i got sleep help, which didn't help. I called Mchn in tears one day and she visited me that arvo and we had a long talk about lots of things. The main one being me putting too much pressure in myself to breastfed when in all honesty, I absolutely hated breast feeding.
When ds was 6mths I did a version of cc which I took from the tizzie hall book. It took 6 weeks including regressions (not 3days) but it worked. Dh was on holidays so could help with dd and take over me when it was all too much.
By about 9-10mths ds was in a great little routine, he became more predictable and everything seemed to click. I was able to keep up with dad's usual activities, which helped get us out of the house and cabin fever at bay.
My my advice would be if you are struggling, don't put up with it. There is support out there. Join a mums group, playgroup. Keep in contact with other mums who will also help you through a very testing time. Keep doing things you enjoy, when you can. Give yourself a break every now and then.
All the best.
Last edited by Little Miss Muffet; 28-01-2014 at 14:56.
30-01-2014 09:19 #6
Thanks ladies. Do you find though that having had a baby already you are armed with a lot more knowledge of sleep and other things that it made it easier to try different things to find what worked a lot quicker?
30-01-2014 09:48 #7
You are definitely more relaxed. I think the baby picks up on that, too!
Just take it as it comes, you still get tired and cranky, but you also know that it's not forever.
I used to love the night time feeds with DS2- such a nice bonding time. I think you appreciate the little things like that a lot more- as you now know that they grow up so quickly! xx
30-01-2014 09:52 #8
I found I had no choice but to leave DS alone more than I ever left DD - which in turn meant he learnt to self settle without me trying really.
We still had a few shocking months between 7-10 where I had to teach him self settling but that was my fault from no routine at night.
I'd jump up to put a boob in his face at night so he'd not wake DD which I knew id regret but I preferred that to her being awake and tantruming.
DD was DHs if she woke at night. Never did it often but I set that rule before DS was born. If she wakes she still goes straight to him or calls out for him.
Going from 0-1 child was much harder to adjust that 1-2 I found. It's beautiful watching them interact too x
30-01-2014 10:01 #9
Karen I think I may need to do the same with #2. DD sleeps through torrential rain, wind and thunderstorms though so I hope she doesn't wake when bub wakes.
I do want to teach self settling early and can cope with a bit of crying now I know I got to that point with DD and she's now a super happy toddler who enjoys both being with us and playing independently
31-01-2014 14:17 #10Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2012
By S12 in forum Newborns (0 - 2 months)Replies: 5Last Post: 25-06-2013, 11:58
By Little Miss Muffet in forum Childcare OptionsReplies: 5Last Post: 20-05-2013, 13:20
By Solly86 in forum General Sleeping & Settling ChatReplies: 9Last Post: 16-04-2013, 10:23
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