OMG, why the hell is everyone attacking you?! I would have done the same in a heartbeat if I thought for a second someone could hurt my sister. You found two cards for HOOKERS- that is no doubt a deal breaker in my mind and surely my sisters. I don't care how that info was found out, now she knows (well she will when you tell her) and if I were her, he'd be long gone. Sometimes the ends DO justify the means.
I honestly question the people on this forum that only one other person has come to your defense.
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24-01-2014 06:08 #21Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2013
24-01-2014 06:30 #22
I question people who think they have the right to jump into other peoples business and relationships?? And dictate to them what they should do without having all the info first? Making massive assumptions all the way along?
If someone did that to me I'd be horrified and so hurt! What if those cards were a joke from a mate?
I also didn't attack the OP, just provided a different perspective that perhaps she hadn't considered.
24-01-2014 06:38 #23
Urgh as someone who has had family meddle in my relationship, just stay out of it. Unless you have proof that he is actually doing something wrong, keep out of it, it is none of your business!
My brother warned me off my now DH saying he was shifty and going off a rumour he heard about him that wasnt true. 10.5 years later DH and I are very happily married with 3 kids and I barely speak to my brother. What he did damaged our relationship.
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24-01-2014 06:41 #24
Wow, worry about your own life, leave your sister alone. I am sure she is a big girl who can take care of herself.
24-01-2014 06:46 #25
Wow, I honestly never knew prostitutes had business cards!
Even if he had used their services before him and your sister got together, how is that any of your business? I think you owe both of them a huge apology for invading his privacy like that. If I was your sister, I would also be pretty annoyed that you didn't trust me to pick my own partner.
24-01-2014 06:56 #26
Um, pretty sure the OP asked what she should do.. people are replying, not attacking. I cannot believe anyone condones the actions of OP, and how people can actually justify going through something which doesn't belong to you. How on earth does that seem like an ok thing to do? If you caught the boyfriend snooping, you would be fine with that, I would assume?
If I was the OP, I would apologise to the boyfriend for going through something which I had no right to snoop through, and apologise to my sister (who if she is able to look after two children should obviously be capable of making her own judgement and looking out for herself). I would also be prepared that for a lifetime of tension if the relationship lasts, because clearly this guy isn't going to have any respect for you after what you've done.
24-01-2014 07:01 #27
Everyone has a line that they aren't comfortable crossing and what the OP did has obviously crossed that line for a lot of people.
24-01-2014 07:18 #28
If you told me you went through someone wallet, I would think you were a thief and wouldn't believe anything you said. I don't even go through my husband of 20 years without asking his permission.
24-01-2014 07:18 #29Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
Well seeing as you asked "what should I do now?" and not "what do you all think of what I did previously?", I would advise that you don't tell your sister what you found; you have no proof that he is using hookers (not that it matters I guess if it was outside their relationship), and she was obviously aware that he's smoking pot and it doesn't bother her. And most importantly, how would you bring this up? What you did was wrong, so anything you tell your sister after "I went through his wallet" probably won't be heard.
I won't lie, I probably would be a bit wary of a pot-smoking, potentially hooker-seeing new boyfriend, but all you can do now is just keep an eye on him. At least if he is dodgy, you have your radar on early now.
24-01-2014 07:30 #30
At the end of the day how you feel about him has no bearing really considering you aren't the person dating him. I'd just leave it be and let your sister make her own decisions in her life.
By Ellewood in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & ChatReplies: 49Last Post: 23-08-2013, 21:11
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