It is difficult to express how I feel...for ME i am really glad that I studied and travelled and had an amazing time being independant during my 20's. I do want that for my kids too...and they both already talk about all the places they want to go and about going to uni.
I loved what I had and think it was the best possible decision for me.
I don't think that young mums are any lessor...but if people ask me what I think is the best possible option...i would say "live and have a great time doing so and wait a few years for kids".
That does not mean that I think people who have kids young are wrong or not capable...but, my ideal is what i had.
I don't get why people get so offended by someone having a different ideal to them!
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16-01-2014 19:57 #71Senior Member
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16-01-2014 19:58 #72
Why does it matter what others think?
Some younger mothers are terrible just as some older are. Just as there are negatives to having children young as there are to having them when you are older.
There is no magical age to bear children, only what is right to you.
If it bothers you what others think or say it says more about you than them.
16-01-2014 20:04 #73
The judgments go on both sides. I can't count the amount of snide comments on here like Ohhh I'm so glad I'm going to be able to play and chase my grandkids, not like older mothers! or that young mums are so much more patient and fun.
The bottom line is that young mums can be great, terrible and in between. Older mothers can be great, terrible or in between. But older mums usually have much more life experience, thus hind sight. At 20 I had lived out of home for 4 years, was in my final year of uni and working 30-40 hours a week. I was pretty grown up for 20. But when I then look at myself at 25 or 30... well I was much more mature with more experience under my belt.
And I think that's what people often refer to, that young parents lack. Not that older parents are better mums and dads or people. Just that we had lived more life before we had kids.
16-01-2014 20:05 #74
I didn't push my views on anyone. You were the one who made assumptions about my post.
She didn't just ask for advice just from young mums, and this is your thread about older mums. You're the one who said it hit a nerve.
I am 100% happy with my choices and my life. Are you?
16-01-2014 20:08 #75
Oh and you have made assumptions as well. Like being young = being healthy. I am much more healthy now than when I was in my teens and 20's. I don't smoke anymore, I rarely drink, I don't take drugs and I exercise 5 times a week. I eat healthy and cook healthy meals.
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16-01-2014 20:10 #76
well the title of the thread is I have a question for older mums lol I don't think anyone has been rude at all, just answering the question and many have clearly said we don't think young parents are crap parents
16-01-2014 20:10 #77
16-01-2014 20:10 #78
16-01-2014 20:12 #79
16-01-2014 20:14 #80
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