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  1. #621
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    Ds (9 months) no longer self settles & i cant figure out why, i havent changed anything. So i just started doing what works (rocking) & dh cracked it at me because he's adamant that ds needs to sleep in his cot. He doesnt want me to go back to rocking ds to sleep again but wont give me any suggestions or alternatives.

    And i had just rocked ds to sleep (i did it anyway) & dh insisted that he had to be moved to his cot (he doesnt transfer). I said no & that id hold him for his entire sleep like i used to but dh moved him & now hes screaming in his cot again. After hours of trying to get him down today. I could cry

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    Oh no heartstringz! I think there is a sleep regression at 8/9/10 months-ish, so hopefully it won't be too long lasting and you can get him back to self settling.
    My DS2 has been having a rough time lately with sickness and his night sleep has gone haywire. I wore my fitbit to bed last night and it said I woke up 9 times and was restless 17 times- I think I'd rather not know!

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    I hope so cause now i dont know what to do if dh wont let me rock him (dh is home as he lost his job). I cant listen to much more screaming & nothing else is working but dh is too stubborn & just says he has to sleep in his cot. The screaming doesnt seem to affect dh like it does me so i just dont think he gets it.

    But if i dont rock him he wont settle at all & will be awake for the entire day then the evening will most likely involve hours of screaming. I dont know why dh doesnt understand that.

    It upsets me too, regressing back to square one after all the effort & progress we made, i could cry. But dh just doesnt get it, thinks i want to go back to rocking him to sleep but i dont, i just dont feel like i have any other choice.
    Last edited by heartstringz; 10-04-2015 at 15:54.

  5. #624
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    My DS was awful around 9 months.

    You have to do what works. Tell your husband to eff off.

    Actually tell your husband that I had to do that off and on until DS was 18 months. It hasn't stopped him from learning to sleep in his cot.

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    Quote Originally Posted by heartstringz View Post
    I hope so cause now i dont know what to do if dh wont let me rock him (dh is home as he lost his job). I cant listen to much more screaming & nothing else is working but dh is too stubborn & just says he has to sleep in his cot. The screaming doesnt seem to affect dh like it does me so i just dont think he gets it.

    But if i dont rock him he wont settle at all & will be awake for the entire day then the evening will most likely involve hours of screaming. I dont know why dh doesnt understand that.

    It upsets me too, regressing back to square one after all the effort & progress we made, i could cry. But dh just doesnt get it, thinks i want to go back to rocking him to sleep but i dont, i just dont feel like i have any other choice.

    You could always go for a walk while your DH does some CC. Tell him to try CC instead of just leaving him alone the whole time.

    Or maybe this might help...http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sl...ep-regression/

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    I would be telling your DH to settle him @heartstringz. Then he may realise how hard it is.

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    Dh is doing responsive settling with him still, but its not working. But because dh is so stubborn he just insists we keep trying responsive settling even if it means ds doesn't sleep at all, all day. Then he refuses to stay home if ds hasnt gone to sleep so we go out, which means ds goes to sleep in the car almost every afternoon these days & cant seem to comprehend why i dont want to start that habit as i dont drive & will therefore have major problems when dh goes back to work. At least rocking him is something i can keep doing once dh is back at work, even though it almost broke me last time. Hopefully i can be stronger this time

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    The screaming doesn't seem to effect my DH either, actually half the time I don't think he even hears it.
    Heartstringz will he let you rock him until he is calm then transfer to the cot?
    I usually aim for self settling for the first sleep of the day, but if that hasn't worked I think you just have to do what you've have to do to get some sleep into them.
    Have you got him to take a bottle yet? And how are the solids going?
    I'm at the point now where he doesn't take a bottle, not eating much in the way of solids and I'm thinking about going back to work soon- oh the joys!

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    Nope wont let me rock till calm then transfer, it seems to be all or nothing.

    Yes thats my theory too - try responsive settling for his morning nap then do what i have to do after that. Dh just thinks we should try responsive settling every sleep (including in the evening if he's had minimal to no sleep all day) & it just doesn't work.

    He takes water in a sippy cup now & will take a small amount of ebm/formula from dh. He was going well with solids but now suddenly he's not eating it again. So im assuming hunger is also affecting his sleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by heartstringz View Post
    Nope wont let me rock till calm then transfer, it seems to be all or nothing.

    Yes thats my theory too - try responsive settling for his morning nap then do what i have to do after that. Dh just thinks we should try responsive settling every sleep (including in the evening if he's had minimal to no sleep all day) & it just doesn't work.

    He takes water in a sippy cup now & will take a small amount of ebm/formula from dh. He was going well with solids but now suddenly he's not eating it again. So im assuming hunger is also affecting his sleep, im offering regular breastfeeds but don't know what else to do.
    Thats good he's starting to eat and drink more, when does he start childcare?


 

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