Mod note from me....I think the OP probably has got the messsage re the soap.
Please, no more mention of the soap or any more condemnation of the OP for methods used....some practical ideas for the OP would be most welcome though I am sure.
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17-12-2013 21:26 #61
17-12-2013 21:38 #62
OP try ignoring the behaviour, turn your back and walk away. Show him that the word no longer affects you because he is just using it as a method
To assert himself and to feel more
And yes 4 yr olds get a mega surge of turdness.. it will pass.
As for the rest of the stuff i've read. Holy phuck. Pretty sure a lady on dr phil
Got arrested for some stuff ive read on here!
17-12-2013 21:43 #63
We had a small swearing incident with one of my daughters around the age of 4 and we stated that that type of language is only used for bigger people and once she's older she can choose to say whatever words she'd like. She swore a few more times and ignored her so she stopped.
My mum still tells the story of my brother at the age of 2 he could say every f'n c bombs going around. My father has a foul mouth so he would copy him. They tried everything from soap, time out, take toys away but in the end the ONLY thing that worked was ignoring. You have to warn everyone around you to ignore his language also or it won't work.
Best of luck OP!
17-12-2013 21:46 #64
Omg lol i dropped the f bomb!
17-12-2013 21:55 #65
The Following User Says Thank You to FrothyFrog For This Useful Post:
17-12-2013 22:18 #66
My ds also went through a stage of swearing which was really embarrassing and I can assure everyone that probably the only time he has ever been exposed to swearing is when I've kicked my toe or dropped something. They only have to hear something once. My ds used to say f***ing hell! Which I know was definatley from me because that's what I have said the handful of times I've sworn in front of him. I ignored it, told him if he is angry or hurt to say "I'm really angry" or "bugger" (which is still not the nicest word but one that he likes and is acceptable to me as well). He grew out of it pretty quickly.
Another time he went through a bit of an aggressive stage, particularly towards his sister which was out of character for him. It ended up being that he was getting bullied a bit by some of his classmates at kindy and he lashed out at home as a way to deal with it. We talked to his teacher and worked through some role playing and stuff he could say or do to help prevent it in the future. His aggressive behaviour stopped almost instantly....
Last edited by RipperRita; 17-12-2013 at 22:27.
17-12-2013 23:13 #67
I am currently having the swearing issue with my SS's. I stick with time out. It has taken a very long time of doing exactly the same thing each time but they have reduced their bad language enormously. Basically I just say two words in a calm voice "room. now." and point my finger in the direction of their room. I will repeat these words another 2 times before I pick them up and place them in their room. The trick is to have a completely firm but neutral voice and do not vary the process at all.
If you keep trying new things or losing your cool it tells them that you are getting flustered and desperate. They sense cracks and exploit them. Consistency is the key. And when I say a long time it has taken the better part of this year but they are older so are much more obstinate with it. With a younger child I would sit them down and tell them "from now on when you use hurtful words you will spend x amount of time here" so that they understand everything. Otherwise target the angry yelling and say "when you shout like that you will have to spend x minutes in your room to calm down."
Its a very tough one but staying calm, patient and consistent is the key.
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