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  1. #1
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    Default Cry-in-arms? 3 mth old nightly meltdown.

    Hi everyone,
    My previously placid 3 month old DD has decided for the last week that she needs to have a huge meltdown at bedtime. She's normally up from her evening nap at around 6, has a feed, play for an hour, bath, feed again, cuddle til asleep then put down. However she is usually up 20 mins later, we feed again, nappy change and then she is impossible to put down sometimes for hours, is obviously over-tired and very fussy. Nothing seems to calm her at this point - refuses to feed, spits out her pacifier, patting/bouncing etc don't work. It seems after an hour or hour and a half of intermittent crying she will just pass out from exhaustion and may sleep a few hours. But far worse sleep than recently when she was easily doing a 6 hr stretch with the same routine, now she's waking up a lot more overnight as well.

    I just want any pointers on avoiding this meltdown, and whether anyone has experience with cry-in-arms ie. when she's over-tired and refusing boob/paci or any other settling technique, should I just hold her while she has a big cry?
    I'll also add we've had minimal luck with self-settling -> definitely can't put her down unless she's asleep, could get away with her waking when she's put in her bassinet if she has a pacifier.

    Thanks in advance.

  2. #2
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    We did cry in arms with DD. She was a very unsettled baby. We started the cry in arms technique at 5 months and it changed our lives! It's hard work but so worth it. DD needed to have her meltdown in the middle of the night. It was an exhausting time but like I said, so worth it. PM me if you want any more details. X

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  4. #3
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    MrsHoward is offline If all I have is you, then I have everything
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    Our DD did a similar thing...i realised putting her to bed at 9 or 10 was too late as she would be so overtired and take longer to get to sleep.
    I start her bedtime routine around 6pm now so shes ready for bed by 7.30pm. She is happier and easier to get to sleep.
    Also at 3 months is a big growth spurt and that seemed to interfere with our bub too as she went from sleeping 5-6hrs to waking every 1-2 hours !!
    DD is almost 5 months now and is improving. I think babies change all the time and you just have to be flexible with their routine
    Hope your bub settles down soon, good luck


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    MrsHoward is offline If all I have is you, then I have everything
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    Forgot to ask is she showing signs of teething ? Drooling, chewing, etc? That might b upsetting her sleep too.
    Our DD started showing signs at 3 months...and still is! People think im crazy cos it was so early but it can happen months before a tooth even comes through.


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    Yep we've done CIA, it's awful but definitely worth it! Bubba's get frustrated and have just as many emotions as we do, only they can't communicate that with us! They're learning so much every day that it can get quite overwhelming and frustrating, and some need that help to get it all out.
    CIA gives them they security that they can let out all of their emotions and you're there to help them through it. It's helped my DS so much, and he sleeps so much better.
    Hold her, talk to her, sing to her and just let her cry.

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    Piyamj  (11-12-2013)

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    I agree with everything said by all.
    Thanks Mrs Howard, I will get cracking with her bed routine earlier. If I reduce the playtime or even just drop it then even if she tries to have a meltdown later, her total awake time isn't that long.

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    Callmedragon - what age did you start CIA? Was the context just overtired and not napping/sleeping? And how long would her crying last for? Did she sleep after all that or just calm down? Thank you.
    Last edited by Piyamj; 11-12-2013 at 05:43.

  12. #8
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    MrsHoward is offline If all I have is you, then I have everything
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    Just want to ask what is Crying In Arms method ?

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    Could you try hopping in the bath with her? It always distracted dd when she was tiny. Still does now at 14 months

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    Mrs Howard, my understanding is that it's if they are crying AFTER ensuring they're fed/changed etc, instead of trying to settle them, to just hold them while they have a cry. It sounds strange, and to be honest I feel my daughter is able to be settled pretty easily, but if she's insanely overtired, nothing seems to work hence I'm considering this technique.
    Thanks Atropos, I will try. The thing is DD loves her baths and is perfectly happy - it's about half an hour after her bath when she fights sleep and loses the plot.


 

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