I work 4-5 days a week, and so does DP. DD is 8 so at school when we're at work anyway.
Our house is far from flawless. DP works on hot tin roofs most of the time (electrician, working in solar) so is understandably buggered and sore when he comes home. I stand on my feet all day long, and often have very tired legs. So... when I get home from work (about 6.30pm at the earliest), I will make dinner, pack lunches for tomorrow, load the dishwasher and that's about it. DD's old enough to do things for herself - I just tell her to shower or whatever...
I'd say I do most of the household stuff, but because I put in such a lousy effort, I don't really care. I only get annoyed if DP whinges about the state of the house... I let him know I'm just as buggered as he is, so if he wants it done so badly, he's free to do it himself.
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Results 21 to 30 of 41
02-11-2013 17:47 #21
02-11-2013 17:56 #22
I am on maternity leave and about to go back to work one day a week. While DH is at work (full time) I care for the two kids and do 99% of housework, shopping and cooking. DH will bath the kids and help put them to bed. He gets up if DS wakes during the night and will take over settling DD at night if I ask. He does all outside stuff and traditional "man" jobs.
02-11-2013 17:56 #23
I'm on maternity leave and have a 5 1/2 month old and a 2 1/2 year old.
DH showers with the 2 1/2 year old most nights and he also cooks dinner most nights. He does the groceries, the lawns, cleans the toilets and drains and will vacuuming and mop if I haven't and he sees it needs doing. He also puts fuel in both cars so I don't have to stop and do it with kids.
The only job he hates doing and avoids is folding the clothes.
He gets by on minimal sleep and I wish he would rest more, but his theory is that it's only a short time where he has to do well over and above what's fair while I have a boob monster who doesn't like toy be put down.
He's a good husband and a good day, I should probably tell him that more!
ETA: he sleeps from 8pm - 1:30am so I don't bother him at night unless really needed. It's not usually an issue though as the older one sleeps well and the younger one only wants boobs when she wakes anyway.
Totally in love with our two beautiful little girls.
Feb 2011 and May 2013
02-11-2013 18:04 #24
At the moment I am on maternity leave with a 3.5 year old and 11mth old. DH works full time. During the week I cook and eat early with the kids. DH gets home and baths them both and does bedtime stories while I tidy what I can, then he puts our toddler to bed while I deal with the little one. We recently did a list of cleaning/jobs to be done each day as I was getting frustrated that nothing was getting done. We split these each night after the kids are in bed. once they are done we sit and relax. I do a little more of the cleaning at the moment as DD is in daycare for a couple of days, but this will change once I am back at uni. I admit that I get frustrated at DHs lack of initiative but the list of jobs has helped somewhat.
02-11-2013 18:14 #25
Omg I just wrote the longest reply and then lost it!
My Dh works 6 days and will only cook us dinner twice a week and play with the kids in his day off. I gave him the job of taking the bin bag out but it's only been done by him maybe 3 times this year!!
I work 1 day a week. I have two kids 4yrs & 2yrs old, 2 cats and 1 elderly dog. I'm struggling under mountains of housework and because I used to be such a clean person it bothers me so much. Everytime I see something that needs cleaning I feel gross but honestly don't have the energy to clean all day long. When I'm cleaning I get interrupted by Dh or the kids and feel like I can never get things done in one (or three!) goes.
My husband actually said to me the other day that he couldn't write on the shopping list what he needed because 'you don't realize how hard I work, I can't be thinking of stuff to put on the list (for himself) too!' haha now that's pretty stupid if you ask me.
I hate that I do everything but I'm so thankful that I only have to work one day (he would prefer I worked more) and also that I have a happy loving relationship (except for the whole cleaning thing haha) and he treats me nicely. Things could be ALOT worse!
02-11-2013 19:18 #26Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2013
I'm currently on maternity leave and DP works full time. DS is 6 months and does a couple of days a week (not normally full days) in day care as I'm due to go back to work soon.
I do most things around the house but we have a cleaner which makes it easier. I'm also not a clean freak like I used to be. I've always done the bulk of the cooking as it usually relaxes me but I won't touch anything outside, especially gardening. I also get my car washed at a car cafe cause I don't want to do it (and it's a nice break sometimes). We don hesitate to get help in when needed (ie gardener, handy man, cleaner) as we both did some long hours when we were both working.
DP will play with DS when he gets home while I cook dinner and then we both do the bath and bed time routine together unless he's working late. I do all of the nights as DS is still bf. Most weekends we each get one day to sleep in each (although he has said that I can sleep in tomorrow as well) and then 2-3 hours of bub free time each if we want it.
I'm back at work at the start of December, starting 3 days/week and then full time from the new year and DP is going to drop back to 3 days/week. Not sure yet how we will work it out but I don't think much will change.
02-11-2013 20:31 #27Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
I have a 15 mo and a 3.5yo. I work 3 days a week in paid work plus doing the books for our farm and running errands and picking up parts. DH works 7 days a week even during our off season. His jobs are to keep the wheelbarrow full of wood, put wood in the fire morning and night and sweep the hearth. He will normally get home at dinner time in off season. He eats, showers with the kids and goes to bed to look at eBay once they are in bed. He loads the dishwasher maybe twice a week and gives the kids breakfast on my day off.
I do everything else, groceries, scheduling appointments, child care run, filling my car with fuel, housework, cooking. He has maybe cooked twice in 4 years.
During our busy season he does nothing, but he works 16+ hour days driving machinery.
I hate how much I have to do - including that 3 years later he still hasn't put our insulation in but I no matter what I say things don't change.
02-11-2013 22:51 #28-
- Join Date
- Jul 2013
I am a single parent and I have a partner who doesn't live with us but helps out so much stays at our house 2-3 days a week, does school visits and is really hands on. He lives a 3 minute drive away too. I consider him part of our family even if he is not there 100% of the time.
I have a 4 and 6 year old, I work part time 2 days a week and study full time at University. I am also expecting another child.
My role is the family is the hard working driven person, who manages everything practical and when i finish uni will be the main money earner.My partner's role is to be supportive of me and keep me grounded as I am very intense and driven and burn myself out easily.
03-11-2013 01:25 #29
I'm a sahm, we have one child who I do everything for. I get up with him while df sleeps. I do bath/bed. I cook dinner, do the washing and clean up ds' mess and do the floors. I do the shopping, bills, errands and pay with ds the most.Df helps with the dishes. He will help dress ds if I ask, and usually gets him from the cot and brings him into our bed during the night. My back has been really sore for the past few weeks, so df has had to step up and do alot of the lifting and bending as well as cleaning, but its coming good finally so I'm back doing it now.
Df works casual (but permanate hours on roster) and also volunteers driving a commute bus. He generally does the yard work.
If I didn't encourage df to do things or pay with ds, he would happily not do either and just play his games too...
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03-11-2013 02:54 #30
I am really lucky as my DH does loads around the house. He works full time, i am on maternity leave currently, but he takes a major role in all household tasks so we share everything. He also puts the kids to bed, we have two so take it in turns to do one each night then swap to other child the next night. He takes the kids out and plays with our toddler a lot. I am currently BF our 11 week old so do the majority with her at the moment, inc. all night wakings, but DH goes in to the toddler if he wakes and gets him up in the morning. This thread has made me realise how fortunate I am to have him!
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